Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Potty Mouth

There is a big potty mouth in my house.  It is my 2 year old son.  It is all quite innocent, actually.  He is just acquiring speech in an interesting way.  Here are some of the things he is saying that make me giggle like a 12 year old in Sex Ed class.  

[Well, I giggle when people aren't staring at me because my son is shouting obscenities.  When we are in public and he is shouting these words, I repeat the correct pronunciation back very loudly, and sometimes add in my own explanation of why he is saying this word.  But, I totally don't care what people think of me.  Not at all.]
  • "peenus"  = "peanuts" 
Imagine your child shouting this as you pass the trail mix in Trader Joe's.  He did it again today - "peenus.  wook, mama, over dere.  wots and wots of peenus."

  • "big wee-wee" = "big wheelie" 
This is a character from the TV show "Bigfoot" on TLC.  He is almost as obsessed with the characters on BigFoot as he is with the Cars characters.  Callen often shouts, "Papa -mumble mumble - big wee- wee..."  To which I reply, "Yes, Papa does like to watch Big Wheelie with you."  Drew thinks it is is really funny to say instead, "Yes, he does."  And then I say, "Child Protective Services."

  • "adjective (big, fast, tall, etc.) *uck" = "big, fast, tall, etc.  truck"
On this one, I HAVE to respond, right?  So, I say, "Yes, Callen, I see the big truck."  Or, "I see the fast truck."  But, you know those times when you are in a mommy fog and your child is playing the "repeating game"?  You know the one.  Where they say the same thing over and over again until you repeat it back.  And, it gets louder and louder.

"Mama, I see a duck."
"Mama, I see a duck."
"Mama, I see a duck!"

"Oh yeah, I see the duck too."  
And then, silence is restored.  For two seconds.  
Then, it starts again -  "Mama, a red car!" ...
Well, one day this was happening and I repeated back what Callen said.  Only, I repeated back what he said, not what he was TRYING TO SAY.  

I replied, "Yes, Callen I see the fast *uck."  [still in a daze]
Then, Logan said, "Silly mommy, that is not a *uck, it is a TRuck."  
  • "I'm horny now!" = "I'm hungry now!"
This one makes me laugh especially hard, because he says it with a true whining/longing in his voice.  And, he will just shout it from out of nowhere.  I can be in my room getting ready to go somewhere and i hear: 
"MAMA?!" (said with great urgency)
"yes, Callen," I call back.
"I'm horny now!"
"Okay, buddy."  (muffled laughter from me)
  • **ssy = "Percy"  (you know Thomas' green friend who chug-chugs along the track.  I cannot even type out the "word" that Callen says without feeling like a potty mouth myself.)

I am giggling even now.
{and, yes, he does kiss his mother with that mouth}


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