tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5841123161946041852024-03-05T22:21:37.544-08:00Ali BrayAli http://www.blogger.com/profile/09903537076363946309noreply@blogger.comBlogger79125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-584112316194604185.post-10218881016099624512017-05-19T11:41:00.001-07:002017-05-19T11:57:19.960-07:00Being Still.<blockquote class="tr_bq" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: large;">"God is either in everything, or He is in nothing." </span></blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">- Richard Rohr</span><img alt="Related image" class="irc_mi" src="http://media.tumblr.com/f83e4934f1b01b42cbb8861343698a5c/tumblr_inline_nhtvtnDWg41siwu20.jpg" height="313" style="margin-top: 118px;" width="500" /> </span></blockquote>
<span style="font-size: large;">Here I am trying to be still, but feeling incredibly twitchy. It's pretty automatic - this urge to keep moving. To start to race down the track in front of me. To look away from the pain. To take action in an effort to move forward. It's the way I have lived for 39 years.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Here is my takeaway ... AWARENESS. If I am still long enough to listen, to gaze, to feel, then I can emerge with a bit of awareness. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">-I am becoming aware of patterns in my life. Patterns of over-responsibility, people-pleasing, and performance. Patterns I loathe. Patterns I want to break.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">-I am becoming aware of feelings that go much deeper than this last hard season. Feeling unseen and that I only matter when I am doing something valuable. Like I am only as good as my performance. Feeling afraid of the shoe that is about to drop and bracing for that destruction. Like a skittish puppy. Breathing shallow, ready for fight or flight. Feeling aware of the erosion that scarcity brings to life ... physical, emotional, financial, spiritual scarcity that is equal parts the cards that were dealt, and part the result of a life being lived stretched far too thin.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">In the spirit of being a person who is compelled to take action, the most healthy step forward right now feels like me intentionally inviting God into these places of emerging awareness. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Inviting Him to speak into these patterns. To shed more light and gently nudge me as I inch towards those automatic responses that feel so deeply ingrained in me. It is like arriving in your driveway without thinking, unaware of the route you took to get there. I don't want to slip into auto-pilot with these patterns any longer. My muscle memory is strong. I need the Holy Spirit to be stronger, and He is. But, it is a partnership and my awareness is the key. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">It means noticing the clenched hands and opening them with a prayer of surrender. Recognizing that it is not up to me to fix anything in this season. I don't have to take control/fix/will/muscle/resume right now. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">It means saying no more than yes and fighting the urge to change my mind or apologize for disappointing whomever is asking. I have been a "yes girl" my whole life. This is a season for pausing and waiting and only saying yes to the things that should be a yes. Resisting the urge to prove I am valuable and to keep everyone happy by showing up and saying yes. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">It means taking each thought captive. That can be such a cliched line. But, when I picture those thoughts as literal bombs being dropped on my shalom, then taking them captive is a necessary part of the battle for peace. Grab them, examine them, look them up and down and determine their intent. Make them show I.D. at the door. Then decide if they are allowed to stay. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">It means inviting God into the feelings and hurts and fears and grief. Maybe even going back to these moments and asking Him to show me where He was when the crap was hitting the fan. Asking the hard questions and waiting for Him to answer. Channeling my inner psalmist and pouring it all out ... anger, grief, questions, sorrow, fears, and being brave enough to let hope mingle there. I am daring myself to dream again, even in the midst of examining the rubble of dreams dashed and broken. Because, just as Richard Rohr has said, He is either in everything, or He is in nothing.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">It means sitting in brokenness with my God, who is the only one that can heal in such a way that we come out on the other side more whole than before. I believe this. One of the colors of "shalom" is WHOLENESS. I don't see wholeness as the starting place like a brand new pair of shoes that haven't gotten scuffed up. I believe that in God's kingdom an old soul on their deathbed is more whole than a brand new baby in their mama's arms. This old soul has experienced bumps and bruises and "scuff marks" galore. It has shaped them. They are who they are because of the story. I am inviting Him to heal and restore the broken places in my story so that I am more whole.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">When we think of being still with God, no doubt we think of the very well known verse from Psalm 46:10 (heck, we may have grown up with it embroidered on a pillow):</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="background-color: white; font-family: "helvetica neue" , "verdana" , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif;">“</span><span style="box-sizing: border-box; font-family: "helvetica neue" , "verdana" , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif;">Be</span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: "helvetica neue" , "verdana" , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif;"> </span><span style="box-sizing: border-box; font-family: "helvetica neue" , "verdana" , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif;">still</span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: "helvetica neue" , "verdana" , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif;">, and know that I am God; I will </span><span style="box-sizing: border-box; font-family: "helvetica neue" , "verdana" , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif;">be</span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: "helvetica neue" , "verdana" , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif;"> exalted among the nations, I will </span><span style="box-sizing: border-box; font-family: "helvetica neue" , "verdana" , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif;">be</span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: "helvetica neue" , "verdana" , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif;"> exalted in the earth.”</span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="background-color: white; font-family: "helvetica neue" , "verdana" , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: "helvetica neue" , "verdana" , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
But, here is the thing - this verse is actually a command. There is no hemming and hawing here. No "maybe you should consider being more still for a season" kind of language. It is pretty clear. Sit your booty down. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Connect your thoughts to truth and see who you are in the light of who I am (KNOW THAT I AM GOD). This is powerful language of superiority. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">And, I guess this leads me to one of the best places of awareness I am settling into ... humility. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">How do I humble myself and declare not just with my lips but with my life that I am not in control? </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">How do I humble myself and declare that I believe I am loved and my identity as His daughter is more important than my identity perceived by anyone else around me? </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">How do I humble myself and resist the zings of affirmation that come from performance and doing? </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">How do I humble myself and admit that I have failed to keep it all together, even amidst a whole lot of trying? Because the other side of that moment of confession is acceptance and dare I say the sweet gift of serenity. Because it was never mine to control or try and keep together.</span><br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
Ali http://www.blogger.com/profile/09903537076363946309noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-584112316194604185.post-56068432315544747692017-04-27T13:15:00.000-07:002017-05-19T11:42:57.045-07:00When all you can do is stop.<div style="text-align: center;">
<img alt="send away balloons with a message and see who writes back: " class="pinImage rounded" data-load-state="pending" data-src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/564x/fc/45/37/fc45374dd0d8b83e5362b434145b819c.jpg" height="320" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/564x/fc/45/37/fc45374dd0d8b83e5362b434145b819c.jpg" width="212" /></div>
<br />
It was a doozy of a week. And the different shades of "doozy" all came as a surprise. It was a week off from school for the kids and work for me. Expectations and hopes floated like happy brightly colored balloons in my hand. <br />
<br />
We were ready for this week. It was like the air that rests just above the surface of the water that you can see from deep below. You are swimming towards it with eager anticipation, feeling the burn in your lungs, kicking harder as the sunlight gets closer. <br />
<br />
One by one, I collected these hopes for my week like balloons and walked along as though I was heading to a happy little party. <br />
<br />
Much of the week was just what it needed to be. Slow and blissful mornings that were unhurried and full of pajamas and reheating the cup of coffee because there is time to sip slowly. Wandering around the house from thought to thought, task to task, not feeling the usual pressure to complete the to do list. Little outings in our fun part of the world - taking in glorious sunshine, yummy eats, and activities like bowling (because why not?).<br />
<br />
Then it came. Life's sharp needle that comes from out of nowhere. So stealthy under the radar that the sound of the "POP!" of one of those balloons you hold in your hand causes you to jump with fright.<br />
<br />
The first pop came as we sat in a doctor's appointment to go over a recent lab test we did for our son. We have been on a long journey of discovering what was making him sick (mold!), and even longer to discover how to help him get better. The results stung. They felt like a mocking voice of defeat. An unexpected slap in the face. A door opening to yet another set of worries. Another set of protocols. Another series of out of pocket expenses. More appointments. More tests. <br />
<br />
More. More. More.<br />
<br />
I drove away so discouraged. And yet, feeling that familiar feeling of accountability and pressure to respond with a plan.<br />
<br />
"Gear up, Ali." <br />
<br />
"You can do this."<br />
<br />
"Put on a brave face for Callen."<br />
<br />
"Be grateful."<br />
<br />
So many thoughts bubbling up in my inner dialogue. And, like any good conversation, replies started bubbling up as well.<br />
<br />
"I am tired."<br />
<br />
"When is enough ENOUGH?"<br />
<br />
"How do I pay for this?"<br />
<br />
"Is any of this working?"<br />
<br />
The tears began to hover right on the edge of my eyelids. You know that feeling. You are like a water bottle that is too full and the slightest squeeze will trigger the spilling over the edge. Each thought, each emotion, each breath was like a band of pressure wrapping itself around me and the tears were falling. I kept my sunglasses on and tried to answer any questions coming from my kiddos with one word answers, avoiding them hearing my voice tremble.<br />
<br />
Keep it together, Ali.<br />
<br />
I was able to get the kids home and get myself off to go for a walk at some trails nearby. Except that by the time I pulled up in the parking lot I was sobbing. The tears were a torrent and the grief was unleashed. There was no keeping it together in this moment. I sat there in my car letting it all out. Riding the wave of emotion, totally out of my own control and completely at the mercy of it. I watched as a young couple stood with a photographer in front of lovely tall wildflowers next to the winding trail. She was adorable with her pregnant belly. She posed so sweetly, holding her tummy with such love and protection. <br />
<br />
The wave of emotion rises higher because I am her.<br />
<br />
I am taken back to that baby in my tummy growing and being cared for so automatically and perfectly. I have hopes and dreams and longings for what life will look like for this child and it certainly does not look like a contaminated home, so much loss, sickness and a very long and winding road trying to recover. It is maternal extinct to want to shelter and protect and nurture. And yet, I feel that even amidst all of the effort, I am failing. <br />
<br />
I suddenly feel like a hamster who has been in one of those cruel mazes. I am eager to find the path through all the tunnels. I press on. I keep moving. Feeling a bit tired and discouraged, but just keep going. Try harder. I think I have seen this corner before ... man, it all looks familiar. <br />
<br />
Until, suddenly, I can't go one more step. I'm done. I sit under the arch and I stop. <br />
<strong><span style="font-size: large;">All I can do is stop.</span></strong><br />
<br />
This, my friends, is where I sit right now. And, here is what I am learning ... that there is a lot of grief I have not allowed myself to feel. In an effort to get my little people out of crisis mode when our world was turned upside down by mold and sickness, I stepped into action and have been steadily plodding along. But, grief is like a shadow, isn't it? It will stay right there, subtly following you wherever you go. Sometimes a bit bigger, sometimes a bit smaller. It all depends on where the sun is shining. <br />
<br />
I sat with a dear friend and shared where I am at right now. As I wiped away tears and looked up, I saw her face just as wet. She has known soul cutting grief. She has walked a dark valley. She just sat there crying with me. For a while.<br />
<br />
Then, she spoke:<br />
<br />
"I am so sorry."<br />
<br />
"This is all really hard."<br />
<br />
"And here is the thing ... Job sat in his grief for 37 chapters. I think you need to let yourself sit in this for a while. Talk about it with God. Feel it. Face it. Wrestle with it. Give yourself that gift."<br />
<br />
This is new for me. I am a "do-er." I am responsible. I am a one on the enneagram (I think).<br />
<br />
Sitting in a mess is painful for me. But, it is necessary.<br />
<br />
Stop. Sit. Feel.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />Ali http://www.blogger.com/profile/09903537076363946309noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-584112316194604185.post-52034396399928879062016-10-25T14:28:00.002-07:002016-10-25T14:28:44.535-07:00Two Powerful Words: Eliminate & Concentrate<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjAsrfVC1ouvsCWXM2qt7WrVChDXbcmrBO4CN_SVlRYsU0hNwWhscTcCJh0GE4EZPfwgYVFYz2J7y8gJlfAiPgspEFSG-oBmKMf9NACVfsOQuvTs7mkv_nVbauTYwCPc5184nHgYvnieeE/s1600/photo_8.JPG" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"></a><br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
</div>
<div>
<div>
Today I am reflecting on words of wisdom that came from a beloved mentor to so many women I know. Anne Ortlund was passionate about MANY things, but I would say the top of her list was JESUS and DISCIPLESHIP. She faithfully walked with a small group of women over a year and poured into them with the hope and expectation that they would duplicate what she had done with other women in their own circle. She was amazing! I was discipled by one of her gals, Lisa Grable. I am so thankful for the season that Lisa poured into me, prayed for me, and cheered for me with intentionality and love. Anne is no longer with us on this earth, but it is incredible to think about her impact while she was alive, and that her impact continues through the people she poured into.<br />
<br />
One of our discipleship mornings around Lisa's table included time with Anne and she shared a lesson with us that was titled, "Eliminate & Concentrate." Although this was a few years ago, I still mull over these words from time to time. They have changed the way I approach commitments and help me evaluate how I am investing my time as a mom, wife, friend, and Jesus follower. <br />
<br />
I am sharing on the blog today my reflection on Anne's lesson that I wrote just after she shared with us a few years ago. I am struck today as I re-read these words how true they are! I am seeing photos of my children that I posted a few years back when they were just 6 and 8 that have me nearly in tears because they are completely different people as I type this now. I want to be back THERE today. I want the opportunity to lift up my kiddos in my arms again and tickle chubby bellies and snuggle them up in a bath towel with skin smelling oh so sweet. <br />
<br />
It makes me want to share this post all the more! The days are long, my friends, but the years are so, so short. And, I am reading these words again for my own self. Because although I am in a different season and my littles have become bigs, this season shall also pass much too quickly and I will wish that I could be back HERE where they are 10 and 13. All I can do is live in this present moment with a commitment to continue to eliminate those things that do not add value and concentrate on those that do. <br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace; font-size: x-large;">[Eliminate & Concentrate]</span><br />
<br />
I recently got to hear an amazing woman, Anne Ortlund, share her thoughts on navigating life well with a group of women. Anne is definitely in her "golden years", and I don't know about you, but when I have the opportunity to listen to someone share about living life well who has lived a lot of life, I lean forward a little closer and listen just a bit more intently. She had so many morsels of wisdom to give us. But one thing she talked about has really stuck with me.<br />
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
She was talking about managing time and she said her two favorite words to implement in time management are <b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 130%;"><i>"eliminate"</i></span></b> and <b><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 130%;">"concentrate"</span></i></b>.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<div>
These two words are gnarly. They are weighty. I feel like they belong in a board room. They sound strong and definitive and driven, don't they? They are not wishy washy or touchy feely.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
And, I am trying to apply them to my life and love the direction they give me.</div>
</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5717601598711059906" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjhNu6NjlJSbksE_yUHtWjjFHPWnS03g05U7EgtVJpaqzl3Vc-KrBlAT-Ajby99FsNAPhbgkjUOQDh7ceMgk2stx5MXyNZTTh9ehMZDFmObARWQNnXMB-ou0mC6o3l6zsmM2OAzg24aAoc/s400/Screen+Shot+2012-03-08+at+10.51.49+AM.png" style="cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 166px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 400px;" /></div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
I know that there are things in my life that need to be eliminated.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Straight up. </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
There are a few places that I see this word doing surgery on my life. </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 130%;">In how I spend my time, and how our family spends our time.</span></i> There is a whole vortex around me sucking me and my time towards it. I am a people-pleaser and a do-er, which means that I want to say yes to everything because number one, I don't want to hurt your feelings or upset you, and number two, I like doing things. But, when I say yes to everything, I end up doing nothing well. And, I end up frazzled, frustrated, bitter and ill. Yes, ill. My body has been pushed to the breaking point far too many times for me not to own that I do damage to my physical body when I take on too much. </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 130%;">I need to eliminate.</span></i></div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 130%;">I also see this in my kids' lives.</span></i> They have countless involvement opportunities as well. They are in school and have homework. They are invited to play dates and birthday parties. They can do brownies, cub scouts, be in school plays, play soccer, football, baseball, swim team, water polo, tennis, golf, dance, gymnastics, music lessons, choir... The list could go on and on. And, hear me when I say this - <b><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 130%;">they are 6 and 8</span></i></b>. </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
I want my children to be active. </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
I want my children to try hobbies and sports and find what they are good at.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
But, more importantly, I want them to be peaceful, humble and to live in a family environment that is not frenzied and frazzled and out of control. These are all "good things" - who doesn't want their kids to play the sports that the kids are around them are playing? I have heard the saying "good is the enemy of best" so many times recently and my soul knows this well. When my children and involved in too many "good" things, the BEST for our family is sacrificed over and over and over. It is easy to say that we will be a "one or two sport" family but more difficult to stick to those guns when all the kids around you are playing multiple sports and you feel like your children will be left behind and made fun of for being the only ones who cannot throw a basketball right. But, I have to step back, focus and remember what my long-term values are for these little humans.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<i>I need to eliminate.</i></div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<i>I also see the need to eliminate in where I let my heart go.</i> This may sound really, really crazy to a lot of people, but I have learned that Facebook is not for me. I have no judgement for those who love this corner of social networking, but FOR ME, I have learned that Facebook does wacky things to my emotions. Aside from the general "time vacuum" that it always ended up being, I found that Facebook pretty much left me in a very melancholy place. </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
I would log on to catch up with the happenings in my friends lives and I would log off feeling like I was out of the loop on far too many happenings (excluded from events that I really did not expect to be invited to, but seeing all the people tagged in the photos and the list of comments that praised how epic it was left me feeling lonely), not funny enough (other people have so many likes and comments on their status updates), like my family doesn't have as much fun as everyone else (everyone else is posting photos of their AMAZING moments from their day), and just generally discontent. </div>
<div>
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEinjfFAZlXfN5-xg-o_7iy716qzcTe_dRqj_nOfjhH3-0LyCbp-HI_fGKfcNmLQxe5ZgL6EY6Gf86B0uTpRngOz5YdvtnvDHHN_-cjlb-0dYAHSJ3QFUTKzGKH3HXanl0bw4aV_kTc3PRgG/s400/reel+1.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEinjfFAZlXfN5-xg-o_7iy716qzcTe_dRqj_nOfjhH3-0LyCbp-HI_fGKfcNmLQxe5ZgL6EY6Gf86B0uTpRngOz5YdvtnvDHHN_-cjlb-0dYAHSJ3QFUTKzGKH3HXanl0bw4aV_kTc3PRgG/s400/reel+1.jpg" style="cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 265px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 400px;" /></a><br />
<div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0000ee;"><u><a href="http://www.nataliessentiments.com/2011/08/blog-post_27.html">[source]</a></u></span></div>
<br />
<a href="http://img0.etsystatic.com/il_570xN.293467688.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"></a><br /></div>
</div>
<div>
My purpose in going onto Facebook was to feel connected and I would always leave feeling more disconnected and just a bit angsty (totally a word). I had to learn that Facebook is not for me. I still have an account that I can use to message people, but I rarely, rarely go on there. This little life shift has served me well. It was truly the best for me. </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Am I completely anti social networking in general? No. I would buy stock in pinterest tomorrow if I could. And, I have even seen that Facebook and other social networking sites have been used for a ton of good in a lot of ways. I do have some pretty big concerns for what all of this means for our kids and our society. I feel like people are losing an important part of human interaction, which is face to face connection. I feel like there is something to looking in a friend's eyes and just knowing that they are having a tough day and digging a little deeper to make sure they are ok. I feel like Facebook and Twitter can make us a little too ego driven sometimes. I mean, should all of our followers really care about where we had lunch? Should we even take the time to post that? Why are we posting that? Would that time be better spent in another way? How are my kids honored by how often I reach for my phone or laptop to update the world? These are all questions I continue to ask myself with regard to technology and how we choose to engage it as a family. At a bare minimum - I have seen the fruit of my decision to eliminate Facebook as part of my daily connection with the world.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 130%;">I also need to learn to eliminate certain thoughts before they start to spin in my head.</span></i> A wise counselor I know says this: <b><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 130%;">"The birds will land on your head, just don't let them nest." </span></i></b> I cannot stop my brain from thinking, but I have the choice in whether they nest or I shoo them away when they are not life giving or helpful.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<a href="http://img0.etsystatic.com/il_570xN.293467688.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" src="http://img0.etsystatic.com/il_570xN.293467688.jpg" style="cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 634px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 570px;" /></a><br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
[<a href="http://www.etsy.com/listing/87942425/change-your-thoughts-5x7-inspirational">source</a>]</div>
</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 130%;">I need to eliminate.</span></i></div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<i>This "elimination" concept has all sorts of practical applications with regard to living in simplicity</i> (getting rid of excess stuff that clutters and could be used elsewhere), <i>and even with regard to a healthy diet</i>. I need to eliminate a few more chocolate covered almonds from my daily eating patterns if you know what I mean.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 130%;">And, I need to concentrate.</span></i> </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5717601481307581586" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgCOHc8_SSlRhaKwrqDn-HFsvynbIthY8BqlAozxxYj7wlODhW8-tK9pOsC1TPXlvCp6vR7FqYPTCP1tj_BNx5uBUykrl8jG3upjS-JuOkt7Vu68dDen9cL9bigFeVx-09Sr43c63_WloA/s400/Screen+Shot+2012-03-08+at+10.52.42+AM.png" style="cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 200px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 400px;" /></div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
I need to concentrate on what I know to be important so that I can make wise choices in what to eliminate. I need to concentrate so that I prevent needing to eliminate. How wonderful it would be if I just knew my limits and really was thoughtful as I walked life and did not get to the place where I have to make those surgical cuts. </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 130%;"><i>I need to concentrate on my children</i>.</span> This time is so fleeting. They will not always be here, and I know that but I still live as though they will. I live as though there will be tomorrows for the life lessons that need to be taught today. I have these moments with them and I want to "mine" these moments well, as it says in the very definition of the word. To sift these moments and separate the metal from the ore. To purify them and make them stronger. </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<div>
There are countless reasons why it is important to concentrate in this time that feels like a breeze blowing through my home ...</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Because there are these moments that will build their foundation of love for each other as brother and sister for the rest of their lives. We are crafting our family's legacy in the moments of everyday life...</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhLi2RabRK6QUGy0L5sm6UrF9WsF0O01feXAhVJI5OPUoF06k-wFTsp1Q_FKQBJtKE0YAiTXmb8CnGcsYPz4s4pvunKlaxdpK6rm_OYwei1t8l6al0Qd5qpSjdnce47jwgw8ARPXPHGfs4/s1600/photo_7.JPG" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5717621769940731698" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhLi2RabRK6QUGy0L5sm6UrF9WsF0O01feXAhVJI5OPUoF06k-wFTsp1Q_FKQBJtKE0YAiTXmb8CnGcsYPz4s4pvunKlaxdpK6rm_OYwei1t8l6al0Qd5qpSjdnce47jwgw8ARPXPHGfs4/s400/photo_7.JPG" style="cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 400px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 288px;" /></a><br />
<div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0000ee;"><u><br /></u></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-text-decorations-in-effect: underline; color: #0000ee;"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5717623723709655538" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiuV6QHL9GAJNbxQg0Dn2_VAHnvMq_ie1JB95izsDunlQhw8WL9fl47SsCw39IQK1hhwxzyc40TbOhWqI5UV0VtlKPhI2r5IqMRShiAy3Mv3EfwiU0z_SNgcuI6BaVm5-JDARDhE4laXAE/s400/I1031_Brays_3402_0281.jpg" style="cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 400px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 267px;" /></span></div>
<div>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-text-decorations-in-effect: underline; color: #0000ee;"><br /></span></div>
Because he only turns 6 this one time (and soon, he will no longer pronounce "Actually" as "ackshly") ... </div>
<div>
<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgCJIIy3lBcSisdZWiA2BlMRwD7R4R7XjuroqZL3XvGXLJHFkmV_YzhStpOARiUR1fy2hCSlraISfwEvpdgkiLpFN-RqtitqVhlUT85j6i8QiFpqMNC3ZHZ6OgGejsZJag7Aap4B6Nq9TA/s1600/photo_5.JPG" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5717621764907387810" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgCJIIy3lBcSisdZWiA2BlMRwD7R4R7XjuroqZL3XvGXLJHFkmV_YzhStpOARiUR1fy2hCSlraISfwEvpdgkiLpFN-RqtitqVhlUT85j6i8QiFpqMNC3ZHZ6OgGejsZJag7Aap4B6Nq9TA/s400/photo_5.JPG" style="cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 400px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: left; width: 298px;" /></a></div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Because I am going to wish that she would sit and hug me and want to talk to me about all the details of her world in 7 years ...</div>
<div>
<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgdBY96xY2_Za5rGKlPBF7u0SabVomQeUoY5pKDZne3KziqsIm4ZG3jp9y9ZG83oMK3lwvqK_gyJ1bBQl_F8SlBDKg2OdgS0uOdhLVjJXvkdinlGYqGtk1SOCvfWtl0TkHnu3BGlFDQ2lk/s1600/photo_2.JPG" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5717621761631855826" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgdBY96xY2_Za5rGKlPBF7u0SabVomQeUoY5pKDZne3KziqsIm4ZG3jp9y9ZG83oMK3lwvqK_gyJ1bBQl_F8SlBDKg2OdgS0uOdhLVjJXvkdinlGYqGtk1SOCvfWtl0TkHnu3BGlFDQ2lk/s400/photo_2.JPG" style="cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 333px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 400px;" /></a></div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Because I am only going to be able to carry him like this for a wee bit longer, and she will only dance and twirl and sing in the background without being self-conscious for a wee bit longer ...</div>
<div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0000ee;"><u><br /></u></span></div>
<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjfO7W8LbAJFLjRTNNt3g-dJiAkpePC5Vg6Qd06l6ks7XA37evnrWmWTialFjF4PUaaeGj9zM81ERmpt5XpmOBIEuIrMud0PkUejTFmYcrJAy-bR-zUhyphenhyphenv3e1CT8dIchG17xzXKLlky-sA/s1600/Image+20.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5717621754771088434" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjfO7W8LbAJFLjRTNNt3g-dJiAkpePC5Vg6Qd06l6ks7XA37evnrWmWTialFjF4PUaaeGj9zM81ERmpt5XpmOBIEuIrMud0PkUejTFmYcrJAy-bR-zUhyphenhyphenv3e1CT8dIchG17xzXKLlky-sA/s400/Image+20.jpg" style="cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 266px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 400px;" /></a></div>
</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
I have this moment that replays in my head that causes me to feel such remorse. A few weeks ago we were getting ready to go on a trip to Lake Arrowhead for a family getaway. My to do list was a mile long and I was frantically trying to get all the games and activities packed up before I had some children arriving at my house for tutoring. My daughter came over and started to hug me as I was sorting card games and packing. I literally brushed her off gently and said, "Honey, I don't have time to cuddle right now. I have got to get this stuff packed up." The look on her face still hurts my heart quite a bit when I recall it. She recoiled and looked as though I had slapped her. "You don't want to hug me?" she said. And, her eyes filled up with tears. </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
I immediately stopped and apologized and told her mommy made a bad choice and tried to make it right. And, she was gracious and received my hug but I could tell I hurt her and it wasn't all totally perfect. There was still that hurt place where she realized that I made a choice and it was not to love her first. It was my stupid to do list. </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Oh man, how I want to concentrate. </div>
<div>
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEinjfFAZlXfN5-xg-o_7iy716qzcTe_dRqj_nOfjhH3-0LyCbp-HI_fGKfcNmLQxe5ZgL6EY6Gf86B0uTpRngOz5YdvtnvDHHN_-cjlb-0dYAHSJ3QFUTKzGKH3HXanl0bw4aV_kTc3PRgG/s400/reel+1.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"></a> </div>
<div>
</div>
<div>
<i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 130%;">I need to concentrate on my marriage and my husband.</span></i> </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-text-decorations-in-effect: underline; color: #0000ee;"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5717624316876249794" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjAsrfVC1ouvsCWXM2qt7WrVChDXbcmrBO4CN_SVlRYsU0hNwWhscTcCJh0GE4EZPfwgYVFYz2J7y8gJlfAiPgspEFSG-oBmKMf9NACVfsOQuvTs7mkv_nVbauTYwCPc5184nHgYvnieeE/s400/photo_8.JPG" style="cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 349px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 400px;" /></span></div>
<div>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-text-decorations-in-effect: underline; color: #0000ee;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
He so often gets the left overs of me. He gets the wiped out, emotionally shut down, exhausted version of his wife at the end of the day. I need to evaluate what in the world is going on here if I value us staying a connected, vibrant and in love couple well into our golden years. I need to concentrate on showing him that I am present and still listening. I need to concentrate on affirming him and speaking words of love to him, especially in times where he needs that bolstering. I need to concentrate on being his love who is there for better or worse, richer and poorer, in sickness and in health - that pretty much means <b><i>BEING</i></b> there our whole life. All of life pretty much fits in those descriptions and I said I would.</div>
<div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjAsrfVC1ouvsCWXM2qt7WrVChDXbcmrBO4CN_SVlRYsU0hNwWhscTcCJh0GE4EZPfwgYVFYz2J7y8gJlfAiPgspEFSG-oBmKMf9NACVfsOQuvTs7mkv_nVbauTYwCPc5184nHgYvnieeE/s1600/photo_8.JPG" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjhCEwAWrSTL3XSHS4S7NRh0pUPxbwkbetzPxJ_fArvehHCwhnfoPYUm22vwt-x5xwDBq2BWNhyZDQ544VCu50G7hgz0eo99U-Q6BE_1LleMUnmeAshZfjIWTrnFZ1qqCZyDZx35H4LuYY/s1600/photo_3.JPG" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5717624308199495970" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjhCEwAWrSTL3XSHS4S7NRh0pUPxbwkbetzPxJ_fArvehHCwhnfoPYUm22vwt-x5xwDBq2BWNhyZDQ544VCu50G7hgz0eo99U-Q6BE_1LleMUnmeAshZfjIWTrnFZ1qqCZyDZx35H4LuYY/s400/photo_3.JPG" style="cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 306px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 400px;" /></a></div>
<div>
<i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 130%;">I need to concentrate.</span></i></div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
So, these are two words that I carry with me in my days. I use them to make decisions and process how we are doing as a family. There will be an ebbing and flowing of activities and time. There are seasons for hibernation and seasons for a flurry of activity. </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
But, I will endeavor to learn to live these words out well.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #ff6600; font-size: 180%;">How about you - what do these words evoke in you?</span></b></div>
</div>
</div>
Ali http://www.blogger.com/profile/09903537076363946309noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-584112316194604185.post-47092813325428979502016-10-14T16:49:00.000-07:002016-10-18T13:22:33.011-07:00Sharing the stories.Okay, so lets be real. My last post was, ummm, quite a few years ago. I took a break from blogging. A long break. Have you ever just needed a time out? Well, that is what it was. Or, that is how it started. I had reached a place where me blogging was not bringing out the best in me. Maybe you are a blogger and can relate. Or, maybe you have experienced something similar with Facebook or other social media space and taken a break there. It just had become a place for me of comparison. Me comparing my blog to others' blogs. I just started to feel motivated by the wrong things and a bit too tethered to the "hit" of comments and likes. Can anyone relate?<br />
<br />
So, the break was initiated as a little breathing room. I have still been writing ... just in journals. Audience of one. <br />
<br />
A lot of life has happened over the past few years, which also contributed to the break. Highs and lows and everything in between. There is much to tell about how God has stepped into each of those places. I feel compelled to share the stories. A through thread will be how the Lord has set my heart on this pursuit of <span style="font-size: x-large;">shalom</span>. Peace. Wholeness. Flourishing. It's my word. If I were to get a tattoo it would be that word. <br />
<br />
I am still learning so much about leaning in and discovering more. I will share the stories.<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">Give thanks to the Lord, for He is good;</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">His love endures forever.</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;"><span style="font-size: large;">Let the redeemed of the Lord tell their story</span> - </span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">those He has redeemed from the hand of the foe, </span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">those He has gathered from the lands ... </span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">-Psalm 107</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Courier New;"></span><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjWZ4nNlcXMDWkaCbPf6ObE39uywyJk3rcYTrbhNzIPmAIkR2TvfJy1MC64pXHRggOUxj8CjYhmimexAkF7pa5PhSlytF5BuGnLt82kHJtdSbtPp15mpehK71fDlGg4-oNllyC_VBOIrnc/s1600/Shalom+signature.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="160" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjWZ4nNlcXMDWkaCbPf6ObE39uywyJk3rcYTrbhNzIPmAIkR2TvfJy1MC64pXHRggOUxj8CjYhmimexAkF7pa5PhSlytF5BuGnLt82kHJtdSbtPp15mpehK71fDlGg4-oNllyC_VBOIrnc/s640/Shalom+signature.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
</div>
Ali http://www.blogger.com/profile/09903537076363946309noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-584112316194604185.post-67218249927088786192016-10-14T16:24:00.003-07:002017-05-19T12:06:03.850-07:00Hello Friends. <div>
My name is Ali. I have two beautiful children - my miracles. I have a pretty fabulous husband - we started out as friends (the best way to start, in my opinion), and then became college sweethearts. He is <a href="http://www.blogger.com/www.drewbray.com">a musician</a>, and our home is blessed to have him often in the background singing & creating melodies. <a href="http://leaningin.blogspot.com/2008/09/honk-if-you-love.html">It seems to be rubbing off on the kids</a> - <a href="http://leaningin.blogspot.com/2008/09/blustery-sort-of-fallish-day.html">a good thing</a>, indeed.<br />
<br /></div>
<div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi2FdjgMx4Vk6ygQkdPG-HRtPr9LwFBNHfDB8mXLHQMQNGJAPl8jt7LpK1kTf0Jdtd9hV6592RVpWnAHVAlakVSw8T7CPEUy8yxyz88Igk_Np1juoCzc258UaaAuRgZLdlkT3M8SM39oVk/s1600/DSC_0508.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi2FdjgMx4Vk6ygQkdPG-HRtPr9LwFBNHfDB8mXLHQMQNGJAPl8jt7LpK1kTf0Jdtd9hV6592RVpWnAHVAlakVSw8T7CPEUy8yxyz88Igk_Np1juoCzc258UaaAuRgZLdlkT3M8SM39oVk/s400/DSC_0508.jpg" width="266" /></a></div>
<br />
Here is a throw back photo to sweet days that seem like they were JUST HERE. Like yesterday!<br />
<br /></div>
<div>
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEga8OcbEWmRoEXlk-uNhKxA7Uhf_sBzq2G1Ib1du_z-g2911YgT17OIbtzhLLXunZ1mYcCDZ1YT2K-10W-MjrJLPuCPshZdhPIVg-O8iGTO445oNwU2MskfuQknGAC_5WrnvFoHBezHFN8/s1600/aboutmecollage.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5474700951140890338" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEga8OcbEWmRoEXlk-uNhKxA7Uhf_sBzq2G1Ib1du_z-g2911YgT17OIbtzhLLXunZ1mYcCDZ1YT2K-10W-MjrJLPuCPshZdhPIVg-O8iGTO445oNwU2MskfuQknGAC_5WrnvFoHBezHFN8/s400/aboutmecollage.jpg" style="cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 289px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 400px;" /></a></div>
<div>
<br />
I have experienced seasons of being a stay at home mom, working from home mom, full-time working mom, and part-time working mom. No matter the title, it is all a whole lot of work.<br />
<br />
I started in the world of blogging pretty much by accident (long story) with <a href="http://www.blogger.com/www.mamamanifesto.com"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">another site</span></a> that was a fun a collaboration with some pretty amazing mamas.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
I am most myself when I have a chance to exercise both my body and my creative energy. </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;">Things I love:</span></div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;">the title "mama" </span> </span>the sound of laughter <span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;">beauty in nature</span> <br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "trebuchet ms";"><br /></span>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "trebuchet ms";"> long walks</span><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span><span style="font-family: "courier new";">my sister</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "georgia" , serif;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="font-family: "courier new"; white-space: pre;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "courier new"; font-size: large;">coffee</span> <span class="Apple-tab-span" style="font-family: "courier new"; white-space: pre;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "lucida grande";">cooking</span></span></div>
<div>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "courier new";"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "georgia" , serif;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="font-family: "courier new"; white-space: pre;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "courier new"; font-size: small;">freshly baked bread</span><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="font-family: "courier new"; white-space: pre;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "courier new"; font-size: x-large;"> interior design</span> <span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"><span style="font-family: "courier new";"> </span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif; font-size: x-large;">Jesus</span></span></span></span></div>
<div>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "courier new";"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "georgia" , serif;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "courier new";">vacation </span><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="white-space: normal;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;">time with my family</span><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "georgia";">Deep Creek Lake, Maryland</span></span><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span> <span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "courier new";"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "georgia" , serif;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="white-space: normal;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "trebuchet ms";"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></span></span></span></span></span>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "courier new";"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "georgia" , serif;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="white-space: normal;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "trebuchet ms";"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"> time with friends</span></span></span></span></span></span></div>
<div>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "courier new";">reading to my children </span><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">healthy food</span><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "lucida grande";"> organic</span><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "lucida grande";"> </span> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "courier new";"> going slowly</span></span></div>
<div>
<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"></span><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "trebuchet ms";">stopping to smell the flowers </span><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "trebuchet ms";"> </span> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;">trees </span><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "courier new";">sand between my toes</span></span> <span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "lucida grande";">running </span></div>
<div>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "courier new";">the smell of rain </span></span><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "lucida grande";">time with God</span></span><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "georgia";"> </span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "georgia";">the sound of rain on a tin roof </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "verdana";">creating new things </span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "verdana";"> out of old things</span></span><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span></div>
<div>
<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;">the color torquoise</span> <span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "courier new";"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">anthropologie</span></span></span></div>
<div>
<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "courier new";">reading</span></span> <span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;">naps </span><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "lucida grande";">movies</span><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "lucida grande";"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"> </span></span> </span> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "verdana";">sunny days</span></span><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "courier new";"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "courier new";">picnics <span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "georgia";">my brother</span></span></span></span><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "courier new";"> </span> </span></div>
<div>
<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"></span><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "lucida grande";"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">most things vintage </span></span><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "courier new";">Europe </span><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "courier new";"> </span> </span> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;">farms</span> <span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "lucida grande";"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">wide open spaces </span></span><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span></div>
<div>
<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "courier new";">starry nights</span> <span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;">my parents</span><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "lucida grande";">photography</span></span> <span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "trebuchet ms";"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;">chocolate <span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span></span></span><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "lucida grande";"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">writing</span></span><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span></div>
<div>
<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "georgia";"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>leaning into life</span></span><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span> <span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>my apron <span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "courier new";"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">my vintage wedding ring </span></span></div>
<div>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: "courier new";"></span><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span>the color green<span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> <span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"> </span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: large;">the gratitude revolution that is shaping my life</span><span style="font-size: x-large;"> </span><span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: x-large;">shalom </span></span></div>
<div>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;">Why I first named this blog </span><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;">"leaning in and looking up"</span></i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;">?</span></div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
I started this blog when we were going through a pretty tough season. We were hit incredibly hard by the economy, and it literally felt like I was being stripped of so much of what had been my daily life. So much was out of my control and I felt really anxious about where we were at, and even more so, about the future. What I knew was that what was in my control was how I responded. I had a choice in how I would respond - I could move forward with fear, anxiety, and bitterness, or I could <i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;">lean into</span></i> what I knew to be true - that God has always provided for me every step of my life. I began to pray for "daily bread" - emotional, physical, spiritual daily bread. I also began to fight to dwell on everything I had to be grateful for. It had to be a conscious decision - a choice to dwell on the lovely in every moment. Yes, we were losing our home. Yes, I was selling my furniture to come up with my first month's rent for a house that would be 1/2 the size of what we were in. BUT, when <i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;">I looked up</span></i> and took in my surroundings I saw two beautiful, amazing children who were healthy. I saw my husband, my best friend, and I knew that together, the four of us were home no matter where we slept at night. </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Choosing gratitude has revolutionized my life. I cannot tell you the peace that I began to feel in that season - peace that was unexplainable. I had mind like water - each pebble life threw into my mind's pond, would splash, and then send out it's slow ripples, but then my pond would settle back again into a peaceful stillness.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Looking up - whether it was at my gorgeous children, or up at the sky, trees, flowers, waves crashing, or a sunset - allowed me to remind my head and heart of the power and creativity of God. If I want to trust God with my tomorrow then I know that I need to remind myself why He is trustworthy. If I can remind myself of who He is - then there is very little wondering left as to whether He can handle what is happening in my life now.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
I continue to choose gratitude ...</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 16px;">It is my hope that I will lean fully into every season of life I am blessed to enjoy.</span></span></div>
<div>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 16px;"></span></span><br />
<div>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 16px;">It is my hope that in the times of sorrow or anxiety, I will lean into the peace and hope that God faithfully promises me.</span></span></div>
<div>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 16px;">It is my hope that in times of joy and abundance, I will lean fully into gratitude and thankfulness.</span></span><br />
<div>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 16px;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 16px;">If ever I doubt that my whole world rests in His hands, I simply have to pause & look up - I will see the sky, the branches and leaves, and most compelling in my world - the faces of my two beautiful children that are miraculous evidence of God's power to create beauty from ashes.</span></span></div>
<div>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 16px;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;">This is where I will share my story in my pursuit of peace. Shalom is where I am camping for now. I will ramble. I will dream. I will cry, and I will laugh. Hopefully the refrain that will weave its way through all of it will be gratitude.</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div>
</div>
</div>
Ali http://www.blogger.com/profile/09903537076363946309noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-584112316194604185.post-35837858964665733662012-12-18T11:07:00.001-08:002016-10-14T17:16:20.836-07:00Tangible Way To Bless Sandy Hook Elementary<br />
We all wish there was something we could do. More importantly, we want a way for our families to process this together. <br />
<br />
The National PTA has shared news that while the students are away on Christmas break, a team of volunteers will be decorating the school and turning it into a Winter Wonderland so that when they return it feels fresh, new and different. <br />
<br />
Isn't that what God does in our lives - His mercies are new every morning. <br />
<br />
I am thankful for fresh starts. <br />
New mornings. <br />
The clear skies after the rain. <br />
The start of a New Year. <br />
Fresh beginnings. <br />
<br />
We can help. <br />
<br />
If you are a teacher, you and your class can make snowflakes to send to Sandy Hook to decorate their school. <br />
<br />
As a family, create snow flakes as a family activity. <br />
<br />
You can go old school and fold the paper and make the cuts. Or, you can go new school and use coffee filters or popsicle sticks, or whatever else you want to create. <br />
<br />
Each snow flake will be unique, just like each precious student who has ever graced those halls is unique, and uniquely loved by God. When you are done - hold those snow flakes in your hand and say a prayer for hope and peace and comfort. <a href="http://media-cache-ec5.pinterest.com/upload/238057530272646500_DnM9w0Uu.jpg">Here is a tutorial for making paper snowflakes</a>, which I found on pinterest.<br />
<br />
Please send all snowflakes and donations to:<br />
Connecticut PTSA<br />
60 Connolly Parkway<br />
Building 12, Suite 103<br />
Hamden, CT 06514<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />Ali http://www.blogger.com/profile/09903537076363946309noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-584112316194604185.post-9573500534930135462012-12-17T10:34:00.001-08:002016-10-14T17:05:20.214-07:00Turn this MERRY into MIGHTY Christmas<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhG7Zv3-GkT2r1k_hMxCSpUAdtn-thOwm_waRJ4tFfiRajCUrXItfglSE6FnrkJX4FPF6qDLUCBQBDDN6ZPWLihV4FrgTgMt0OArCH4iEc0nVEME-K87KRVnimHDPuGdWb2FL4Vg2g-EKYI/s1600/MightyChristmas.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhG7Zv3-GkT2r1k_hMxCSpUAdtn-thOwm_waRJ4tFfiRajCUrXItfglSE6FnrkJX4FPF6qDLUCBQBDDN6ZPWLihV4FrgTgMt0OArCH4iEc0nVEME-K87KRVnimHDPuGdWb2FL4Vg2g-EKYI/s320/MightyChristmas.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
It is difficult to escape the heaviness that lingers in the air right now. The tragedy in Connecticut stands in heavy contrast to the "Christmas spirit" that 'tis the season. <br />
<br />
I have a 6 year old son. <br />
<br />
It's hard not to see his face when I hear the news and contemplate how this could have happened. It's difficult for me to shut off the questions that come as I think of him ever being in a situation like that. I cannot even begin to process the pain of searing loss if I were dealing with the aftermath as these parents are.<br />
<br />
I am a teacher. <br />
<br />
I am entrusted these beautiful children, these souls, to instruct and shepherd as they are in my care. It is unfathomable to ponder a moment like that in my classroom. Innocence shattered. Fear unbridled. Ugliness and evil screaming out.<br />
<br />
I have prayed many prayers over the past few days. Small prayers whispered under my breath as my brain tries to wrap itself around this news. Prayers of gratitude for messy craft tables and sticky fingerprints. Prayers of gratitude for "one more hug" at bedtime. Prayers of comfort for the families experiencing this searing loss and unfathomable pain right now. Prayers of protection for my own children and the children I teach. Prayers for peace that transcend our understanding. For, truly, this is something no one can understand.<br />
<br />
The one thing that I continue to come back to is my favorite line from one of my favorite Christmas carols ("O Little Town of Bethlehem"):<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: x-large;"><i>"The hopes and fears of all the years </i></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: x-large;"><i>are met in Thee tonight."</i></span></div>
<br />
For the past two weeks I have been sharing this line with my students as we work on our Christmas art projects. It is awe inspiring to me. I think about <span style="font-size: large;">all the hopes</span> and <span style="font-size: large;">all the fears</span> from the beginning of time to the end of time, and I try to stack them on top of each other in the tallest tower that stretches higher than the heavens. I then see Jesus, and he knocks it over and they crumble. He came to be Emmanuel and to know and share in our highest hopes and the deepest fears. He came to live with us the mess that is this life, and ultimately defeat those ugly fears. He knew longing like we know longing. He knew pain and loss and brokeness and ugliness.<br />
<br />
The fears in that classroom in Connecticut alone are too much for my heart and mind to comprehend. And yet, this Jesus, my Jesus, takes those, and the fears of the mothers through the ages, the whispers from the darkest moments of the Holocaust, and all the other crazy painful moments in history, and he carries them on his shoulders. It makes the gift of the cross bigger today. I cannot even sit in the reality of what that classroom must have felt like for longer than a few seconds - it is just too much. Jesus doesn't walk away. He doesn't say, "It is too much." No - he walks towards it. And more. And he carries it and he defeats it.<br />
<br />
The celebration of the angels and the stars blazing in the sky at His birth make more sense now. Light in contrast to darkness. The hope that arrives in contrast to the darkness that has lingered is just so beautiful. I believe heaven shudders at these ugly moments in history. It aches to see pain and darkness and evil. That moment in time when the plan for redemption was put into motion - that moment when Jesus was born - that was the moment that heaven celebrates that an end to the darkness is near. <br />
<br />
So, today, I pause to reflect on that beautiful thought. That He came to cover the fears, and to know the hopes. We still see the ugly because we are stuck in the now and not yet. It is not yet perfect, but in the now, we can still see that HE CAME. He entered this yuck, for the purpose of carrying the pain.<br />
<br />
My dear friend, Tim Timmons, has written two songs that have become my soundtrack for the last few days. They are Christmas songs and they are timely.<br />
<br />
The first is his version of "Oh Little Town of Bethlehem" with his own flair added in.<br />
To listen, <a href="https://soundcloud.com/andydtoy/o-little-town-of-bethlehem-tim">go here</a>.<br />
<br />
The chorus says,<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">"Rejoice! Rejoice! Emmanuel, God is here. </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Rejoice! Rejoice! If God is for us, we won't fear.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Take joy in the comfort of the Prince of Peace,</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">And joy in the power of the King of Kings,</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Rejoice! And, again we say Rejoice!"</span><br />
<br />
The second in on the album "A Christmas Together", vol 3 and it is called "Mighty Christmas".
The phrase "Merry Christmas" is viewed in our present days as happy, jolly, twinkly. But, "merry" in the old school language was more along the lines of "mighty". Robinhood and his MERRY men were not happy men giggling through the forest. They were MIGHTY men. A force to be reckoned with.<br />
<br />
This song is all about the need for this year to be different. For Jesus to turn the merry into a Mighty Christmas. For the hopes and fears and doubts to be broken by the power that is in Him. If ever we needed a mighty Christmas, I would say it is now. That is one of the prayers I continue to whisper. That God, in the way that only He can, would show up for these families. That He would bring mighty peace and mighty hope into a very dark and broken place.<br />
<br />
To play "Mighty Christmas", click on the play icon and it will take you to Tim's myspace radio page:
<a class="my_play my_27" href="http://www.myspace.com/timtimmons/music/songs/mighty-christmas-89304530" style="background: url(http://x.myspacecdn.com/modules/common/static/img/playbuttonsprite.png) no-repeat 0 -85px; border: 0; display: inline-block; height: 27px; margin: 0; overflow: hidden; padding: 0; text-indent: -9999px; width: 27px;" title="Mighty Christmas">Mighty Christmas</a><script defer="true" src="http://www.myspace.com/music/buttons/js"></script><br />
Here are the lyrics to "Mighty Christmas". If you are someone who is at a loss for what to pray right now, pray these lyrics. God is listening... <br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">What if all of this were true?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Emmanuel, how God came through</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Is this more than Christmas cheer?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Is this just a story, what if it's real?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Would I still be lonely,</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Would I know fear,</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Would my worry hold me</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Could I be healed?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Crying out loud,</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">This year Like never before </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Jesus reveal a little more to my soul</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Would you show me just how powerful </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">You are more than a manger</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Jesus the mighty Savior </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">in my soul, turn this Merry into Mighty Christmas</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Turn this Merry into Mighty Christmas</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">What if in my silent nights</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">You were enough </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">You were the light</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Angels saying do not fear</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Is this still the promise?</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">You still come near</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Meet me in my lonely</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Tear down my fear</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Hold me through my worry</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">And, Lord would you heal</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Crying out Loud - </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">This year like never before, </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Jesus reveal a little more</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Would you show me just how powerful </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">You are more than a manger</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Jesus the mighty Savior </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">in my soul, turn this Merry into Mighty Christmas</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Turn this Merry into Mighty Christmas</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Stronger than the weight of gravity</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">That whisper in my bones reminding me</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Everything I'm not, and I try to be</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">You are</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Meet me in my lonely</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Tear down my fear</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Hold me through my worry</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">And, Lord would you heal</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Crying out Loud - </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">This year like never before, </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Jesus reveal a little more</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Would you show me just how powerful </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">You are more than a manger</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Jesus the mighty Savior </span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">in my soul, turn this Merry into Mighty Christmas</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Turn this Merry into Mighty Christmas</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
I am wishing you a mighty Christmas.Ali http://www.blogger.com/profile/09903537076363946309noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-584112316194604185.post-63469548160031705092012-03-05T12:18:00.003-08:002012-03-05T21:21:27.199-08:00Lent in Everyday Language: Feeling LovedI am still following along with my friend, Amy, over at Soul Simple in her journey through Lent in Everyday Language. <div><br /></div><div> Today is Day 13. </div><div><br /></div><div> Yes, I realize I missed a few days. I am constantly reminded of how the reality of my life is meshing with my ideals of what I want my life to be. My ideal is that I would be able to live out this thoughtful, soul-transforming lenten experience and blog about it like crazy because I love processing my learning through writing. The reality, however, is that my life is messy and full and some of these days my lenten experience will go unblogged because there are just not enough moments.<div><br /></div><div>But here I am today and I am excited to process these 2 questions issued today:</div><div><br /></div><div><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:130%;">1. Where did I feel most loved today?</span></b></div><div><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:130%;"><br /></span></b></div><div><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:130%;">2. Where was it hardest for me to feel love today?</span></b></div><div><br /></div><div>First, I loved that Amy shared this note on her blog a couple days ago with regard to the examen:</div><div><br /></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(102, 102, 102); line-height: 24px; font-family:Arial, Verdana, sans-serif;font-size:14px;"><p style="background-image: initial; background-attachment: initial; background-origin: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: transparent; border-top-style: none; border-right-style: none; border-bottom-style: none; border-left-style: none; border-width: initial; border-color: initial; font-size: 14px; margin-top: 13px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 20px; margin-left: 0px; outline-style: none; outline-width: initial; outline-color: initial; padding-top: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; ">Fr. Joe Tetlow, in an introduction to the Examen says this..</p><blockquote style="background-image: initial; background-attachment: initial; background-origin: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: rgb(250, 250, 250); border-top-style: none; border-right-style: solid; border-bottom-style: solid; border-left-style: solid; border-width: initial; border-color: initial; font-size: 14px; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 38px; margin-left: 0px; outline-style: none; outline-width: initial; outline-color: initial; padding-top: 20px; padding-right: 20px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 20px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; font-style: normal; quotes: none; border-right-width: 1px; border-right-color: rgb(229, 229, 229); border-bottom-width: 1px; border-bottom-color: rgb(229, 229, 229); border-left-width: 8px; border-left-color: rgb(229, 229, 229); background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; "><p style="background-image: initial; background-attachment: initial; background-origin: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: transparent; border-top-style: none; border-right-style: none; border-bottom-style: none; border-left-style: none; border-width: initial; border-color: initial; font-size: 14px; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 20px; margin-left: 0px; outline-style: none; outline-width: initial; outline-color: initial; padding-top: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; ">Never, never start examining yourself until you have thanked God for the gifts that God is giving to you—not in general, not in the past, but right now, today. That’s how you start The Examen. I think people who can keep the Examen up often do that.</p><p style="background-image: initial; background-attachment: initial; background-origin: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: transparent; border-top-style: none; border-right-style: none; border-bottom-style: none; border-left-style: none; border-width: initial; border-color: initial; font-size: 14px; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 20px; margin-left: 0px; outline-style: none; outline-width: initial; outline-color: initial; padding-top: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; "><br /></p><p style="background-image: initial; background-attachment: initial; background-origin: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: transparent; border-top-style: none; border-right-style: none; border-bottom-style: none; border-left-style: none; border-width: initial; border-color: initial; font-size: 14px; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 20px; margin-left: 0px; outline-style: none; outline-width: initial; outline-color: initial; padding-top: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; "><br /></p></blockquote></span></div>If there is one lesson I continue to re-learn, and one posture that I am continuing to practice, it is this practice of praise - gratitude - thanking. My world has been revolutionized by gratitude over and over. I have seen this path that I have walked down and how in the midst of trials and scarcity and really terrifying places, that when I pause to thank God for what He has done or is doing, everything changes. Not so much circumstantially, but in my soul. I think that is why I am so in love with Ann Voskamp's book 1000 gifts. I have read and re-read that book 5 times. It is such good food for my thoughts. I keep copies on hand to give away because I truly feel like the act of praising and thanking God just might be the cure for everything. I am like the father from "My Big Fat Greek Wedding" - only, I offer you gratitude instead of windex. <div><br /></div><div>Alright, so <b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:130%;">where did I feel most loved today</span></b> ...</div><div><br /></div><div>Sitting in the middle of my life group last night. </div><div><br /></div><div>We go around the room and share where we are at. We give a snap shot of highs/lows and any blaring needs that we have. I didn't expect to turn into a weeping, red hot faced girl with tears and hiccups coming out of me all at once. No, I did not expect to melt into the "ugly cry". But, as I did, I felt so incredibly loved. When I could finally see through my tears, all I could see was love looking back at me. And, at the end of the night our dear friends gathered around my husband and I and prayed for us and it was beautiful. To be walking through life with a group of people who have our back and hold us up when our knees are weak is such a beautiful blessing and I am so thankful.</div><div><br /></div><div>And, <b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:130%;">where was it hardest to feel loved today ...</span></b></div><div><br />In the midst of my sharing and my hot, tear-filled emotional release, I think I realized that I must have a wound somewhere in my soul that causes me to continually struggle with worrying about whether God will meet my needs. I am asking Him to reveal wisdom and to expose what this might be and kind of feel like I am peeling back the layers of an onion. I look at my children and their ability to walk in freedom each and every day - knowing that they are loved and will be cared for. </div><div><br /></div><div>And then as I examine my own life - and I see this disconnect. </div><div><br /></div><div>Here I have this amazing Heavenly Father who clearly loves me beyond my understanding. </div><div><br /></div><div>He sent His son. </div><div><br /></div><div> I can hardly type those words. </div><div><br /></div><div> To think of sending <i>my son</i>. <br /></div><div><br /></div><div>But, I don't feel like my children feel. And, then, I realize - <i>that is my Jericho</i>. The fortress that I am marching around. It is the doubt and the fear and the whisper in the back of my mind that <i>"He loves me not."</i></div><div><i><br /></i></div><div>And once again, I go back to the words: <i>"Anxiety is momentary atheism."</i></div><div><br /></div><div>And I sit and I ask for God to transform and renew my mind once again. That I would believe these words:</div><div><br /></div><div>"If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare His own Son, but gave Him up for us all - how will He not also, along with Him, graciously give us all things? ...Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? </div><div><br /></div><div>... No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither neither nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord." Romans 8:31 - 39</div><div><br /></div><div>I think of this love demonstrated for me. I think of the example of Jesus conquering death and saying we have all power and authority. I think of Him seated by the Father praying for me.</div><div><br /></div><div>And, I pause. </div><div><br /></div><div>I sit here amazed. </div><div><br /></div><div>And, I simply pray that I would grasp the depth of this love. That it would wash over me. Change my heart. And help my unbelief. And, that I would live out this love.</div><div><br /></div><div>I am humbled.</div></div>Ali http://www.blogger.com/profile/09903537076363946309noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-584112316194604185.post-80646183624611911152012-03-01T13:15:00.003-08:002012-03-01T14:30:43.419-08:00Lent in Everyday Language: Trusting God<div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:georgia;font-size:180%;">"Those who know Your Name will trust in You;</span></i></b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:georgia;font-size:180%;">for You, Lord, have never forsaken those who seek You." -Psalm 9:10</span></i></b></div></div><div><br /></div>I am continuing in this journey through Lent with my friend Amy over at <a href="http://soulsimple.wordpress.com/">Soul Simple</a>. Today I am processing <a href="http://soulsimple.wordpress.com/2012/03/01/lent-in-everyday-language-day-nine/">this post</a> here in my own life.<div><br /></div><div>These are the two questions that Amy poses for examen:</div><div><br /></div><div><b><i>Where am I trusting God today?</i></b></div><div><b><i><br /></i></b></div><div><b><i>Where do I need to trust God today?</i></b></div><div><br /></div><div>Ugh. Let me just pull the covers up over my head for a minute while I eat a yummy bar of dark chocolate. If I could go to sleep for the next 30 days I would. That is my true feeling right now. I'm tired and this season is exhausting. I feel like I am battling every minute to keep my head and heart in the right place. The last 24 hours have been particularly heavy as my husband and I have had lots of conversations about finances and our situation. </div><div><br /></div><div>I think of Jesus' words in Matthew telling us not to worry about what we will eat or drink or wear. And I want to so badly not worry about how we will survive this season of scarcity, but in the face of reality it is really difficult not to go <i>there</i>. </div><div><br /></div><div>so...</div><div><br /></div><div>1. <b><i>Where am I trusting God today?</i></b></div><div><b><i><br /></i></b></div><div>I am in this beautiful place of reality meeting theology and I want with every fiber of my being to believe that God means what He says. That His peace can transcend all understanding. That though it looks bleak on a day where funds run low and bills run high, that He will provide. That when we know the direction to go, but are still unclear of the exact path and details are not in focus yet - that He will whisper the way to go as He has promised (Psalm 73:23-24) step by step. I am trusting that He is with me in this and that He sees where we are. I am choosing to take every thought captive and trust that He cares about all this prayers whispered as I do battle to stay in the here and now and not crawl to my bed to ride out the next 30 days that feel unknown and ominous. Today is not a day where I feel victorious and like the woman who laughs at the days to come. But, I am trusting that God is here with me in this day and that He sees what we need and is going to give us our emotional, spiritual and physical daily bread.</div><div><br /></div><div> </div><div><br /></div><div><b><i>2. Where do I need to trust God today?</i></b></div><div><br /></div><div>"You are a God of seeing. Truly, here I have seen Him who looks after me." - Gen. 16:13</div><div><br /></div><div>These words are so powerful to me. They reveal this quality of God - that He sees our specific needs and hears our specific prayers and that He looks after us. He loves us, Oh how He loves us. Couldn't you just stand and sing those words over and over until the meaning penetrates the tender places of your heart that feel alone and desperate and unloved; uncared for. </div><div><br /></div><div>Today - I need to trust that He is still a God of seeing and that <i>He sees me. </i>That He is walking <i>with</i> me and doing battle<i> with</i> me and interceding <i>FOR</i> me. Hearing the words from my heart before I can even speak them out loud. </div><div><br /></div><div>I read this <a href="http://www.aholyexperience.com/2012/03/how-to-make-your-march-amazing/">in a post by Ann Voskamp</a> today:</div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 18px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; "><p style="font-size: 13px; "></p><blockquote style="font-size: 13px; "><p>It could be this in the middle of Lent: <strong>March — the month to march around walls in our lives and pray for God to bring down everything that keeps us from Him. </strong></p><p><strong><em>March — a 31 day march around the Jericho that’s keeping You from Jesus.</em></strong></p><p>31 days to march around that one fear. March around that one worry. March around that one temptation. I know what my Jericho is. I name it. I will go home and I will write it down.</p><p>Write it in a prayer journal. <strong>Circle everyday of March on the calendar, make a prayer circle around each day <a href="http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Joshua%206:12-17&version=NIV">a<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#000099;">nd march around that Jericho</span></a>, head bowed.</strong> <em>Pray around it again and again</em> — sliver blades cutting a circle, encircling all that is with His will, presence, grace.</p></blockquote><p style="font-size: 13px; "></p><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:100%;">I think my fear is that He won't show up as my Provider. He has never failed me before, and yet, these same little weeds grow around my little seed of faith threatening to choke it out. So, today, I need to trust that God is WHO HE SAYS HE IS. That I would be able to live out this verse:</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:100%;"><br /></span></div></span><div><div style="text-align: center; "><b><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:georgia;font-size:180%;">"Those who know Your Name will trust in You;</span></i></b></div><div style="text-align: center; "><b><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:georgia;font-size:180%;">for You, Lord, have never forsaken those who seek You." -Psalm 9:10</span></i></b></div></div><div><b><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:georgia;font-size:180%;"><br /></span></i></b></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 18px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; "><div style="font-family: Georgia, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:100%;"><br /></span></div><div><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:verdana;font-size:180%;">The Names of God</span></b></div><div style="font-family: Georgia, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:100%;"><br /></span></div><div style="font-family: Georgia, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:100%;">Elohim ~ Creator (Genesis 1:1)</span></div><div style="font-family: Georgia, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:100%;">El Elyon ~ The Most High/Sovereign (Genesis 14:18-10)</span></div><div style="font-family: Georgia, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:100%;">Jehovah-Tsidkenu ~ The Lord our Righteousness (Jeremiah 23:6)</span></div><div style="font-family: Georgia, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:100%;">Jehovah-Jireh ~ The Lord will provide (Genesis 22:14)</span></div><div style="font-family: Georgia, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:100%;">Jehovah - Roi ~ The Lord is my shepherd (Psalm 23:1)</span></div><div style="font-family: Georgia, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:100%;">Jehovah-Shalom ~ The Lord is peace (Judges 6:24)</span></div><div style="font-family: Georgia, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:100%;">Jehovah-Nissi ~ The Lord is my Banner (Exodus 17:15)</span></div><div style="font-family: Georgia, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:100%;">Jehovah-Rophe ~ The Lord who heals (Exodus 15:26)</span></div><div style="font-family: Georgia, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:100%;">Jehovah-Shammah ~ The Lord is there (Ezekiel 48:35)</span></div><div style="font-family: Georgia, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:100%;">Jehovah-Saboath ~ The Lord of hosts (1 Samuel 1:3-11)</span></div></span></div>Ali http://www.blogger.com/profile/09903537076363946309noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-584112316194604185.post-59762329104677266702012-02-29T09:44:00.002-08:002012-02-29T10:05:44.359-08:00Lent in Everyday Language: God Save UsI am journey with my friend Amy through Lent and she provides daily questions as prompts for digging a bit deeper. Today I am processing <a href="http://soulsimple.wordpress.com/2012/02/28/lent-in-everyday-language-day-seven/">this post</a>.<div><br /></div><div>Here are the questions Amy poses for reflection on the past 24 hours.</div><div><br /></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:130%;"><i>1. Where do you notice God saving you today?</i></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:130%;"><i><br /></i></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:130%;"><i>2. Where do you need God to save you today?</i></span></div><div><br /></div><div><b>Where do you notice God saving you today?</b></div><div>Yesterday I had the privilege of getting to listen to a beautiful woman share her heart with a group of women who are all a part of discipleship groups. Anne Ortlund is an author and truly amazing woman. She is older and has lived a lot of life. She and her husband Ray (who has passed on) started small discipleship groups years ago as they realized that they would never be able to make a very big impact on their church community one person at a time. This woman has taken in groups of 4-5 women every year and discipled them from September to June. To date she has done this with over 200 women. Her goal is to bring these women along and then release them to do the same. How simple and how utterly powerful. So, now I am in a group that is led by one of the gals that she mentored a few years ago. I sat with about 20 other women yesterday and we got to hear Anne share her heart. She shared so many morsels of wisdom with us. But, the moment where I felt God saving me was as Anne begin to challenge us to serve others in this same way. To step forward in a slow and steady way with our time, talents and resources. To view our lives as a march from San Diego to Maine and to cover 20 miles, 20 miles, 20 miles. To daily cover 20 miles and to do this in our service too. It was a deep soul confirmation for me. Just the night before I sat with my husband and shared my anxiety over the future. We know the direction God is leading us. It is to launch a missional church in our community. We have seen that God is working and that we are called to step out and lead small groups of people on a faith journey as we love our neighbors and are present. We know that is the direction we are being called. But, there are so many areas of ambiguity between here and there. How to start? What steps to take? The voices that taunt and tell us that we are not capable. How do we provide for our family as we take these steps? </div><div><br /></div><div>I had a big moment of doubt as the ambiguity of all these details made me want to just shut the door and stop pressing forward. </div><div><br /></div><div>God's saving grace to me was that He reiterated His heart for people to be taken on a journey by NORMAL people (not necessarily the best teachers or leading pastors of our generation) and that He would lead us 20 miles at a time. At the very end of Anne's talk she looked at the room and said, "God is moving here. He is going to bring revival to this neighborhood. He is going to use this community to impact Orange County and our nation. He is working." The bubble of excitement in her voice and the confirmation of her feeling what the Spirit is speaking to our hearts as well. God's grace to me. And I could see it written on the other women's faces too - we have tasted and seen that God is working and is doing something.</div><div><br /></div><div><b>Where do you need God to save you today?</b></div><div>I need His voice to guide me on the path that He has layed out for me and my family. I can get caught up in a week from now and lose sight of today. </div><div><br /></div><div>I need Him to show me that this verse is truth:</div><div><br /></div><div>"Your word is a lamp unto my feet and a light unto my path." - Psalm 119:105</div><div><br /></div><div>That as I walk my 20 miles, 20 miles, 20 miles - that He will show me what path to take step by step. Even the 20 miles that lay out ahead are too far for me to see. I need to feel Him whispering guidance in each step.</div><div><br /></div><div> </div>Ali http://www.blogger.com/profile/09903537076363946309noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-584112316194604185.post-1115449268403015752012-02-27T10:21:00.003-08:002012-02-27T11:06:18.550-08:00Lent in Everyday LanguageI have never really practiced Lent. I have engaged it on the level where I have given something up like sugar or chocolate or sweets. But, I have never really taken the time to explore what this tradition means on a deep level and taken the time to<i> practice</i> it. <div><br /></div><div>As a nearly life-long Christian, I find myself in a season where I am trying to see aspects of my faith through new eyes. Perhaps it is the season of life that is stretching me beyond myself so I look for new tools that the disciples of Christ have utilized for years in their soul formation.</div><div><br /></div><div>What I love about my learnings about this tradition called Lent is that it meets me right where I am. In need of a Savior every single day, in every single moment. </div><div><br /></div><div>My friend Amy is embarking on a journey over on her blog called <a href="http://soulsimple.wordpress.com/">Soul Simple</a> to explore "<a href="http://soulsimple.wordpress.com/2012/02/21/184/">Lent in Everyday Language</a>" and has a new post each day where she offers two questions to process and she beautifully shares her own processing. I love that lent is this opportunity to pause and lean a little closer to being formed in Christ's image. I have been exploring a lot of Genesis and love hearing about God creating man and woman in His image. I feel like the rest of the bible centers around God pursuing us in order to make us into His image again. Sending Jesus so that we can be reconciled and made into His image (holy and blameless). I am leaning into this aspect of formation. If you are interested in taking this journey, you can start today - on Day 6. No need to panic and try to catch up. Just start right where you are. I am.</div><div><br /></div><div>My very simple understanding of Lent is that it is the act of preparing the heart for Easter. Historically, this has taken shape in a form of sacrificing. You hear people saying what they are "giving up for Lent" and it is about sacrificing something so that we can become more like Christ and how He sacrificed His life for us. But for me there is another layer - I am viewing it not solely about forfeiting, but also about formation. It feels like an invitation to step further into being formed in Christ's image. Ann Voskamp wrote that "it is to be dispossessed of the possessions that possess - in order to be possessed by God." To empty the soul in order to know the filling of God.</div><div><br /></div><div>So, maybe it is not about possessions like stuff (although it could be). Maybe it is more about our way of being and the thoughts, actions, emotions and routines that fill us with the opposite of <b><i>WHO God is</i></b> (His image).</div><div><br /></div><div>If I know that the fruits of the Spirit (love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, self-control) are the fruit of being connected to God and are reflections of who He is, then I think I should be able to look at my life and see what the opposites of those attributes are that are on display in my life. That would be the area where I need more image forming. </div><div><br /></div><div>If lent is about my emptying my soul of my own stuff in order to know the filling of God - well, then, "To the brim!" is what my soul cries out. I want to be filled to overflowing with His love and joy and peace. I can see where I need to make room for Him. Do some soul house keeping.</div><div><br /></div><div>But, it is so hard. So hard to empty myself of my love of me and the habits that shape me into me. Hard to wake up early to find quiet time. Hard to give up that "down time" of senseless media that makes it so easy to check out in the times when I need to check in. Even those twisted sisters: fear and worry - they beckon my soul to snuggle up with a blanket of self-pity.</div><div><br /></div><div>Isn't it true that Lent and our quest to sacrifice and "work out our salvation" will reveal how truly broken and useless we are. It is like asking for a flashlight to shine on our failures and flailing, because I will fail in this attempt! How incapable I am of walking a road of sacrifice like Jesus. Maybe one of the gifts of Lent is realizing, yet again, how in need of a Savior I am. I could work with every fiber of my being to do this perfectly, and I would fail. I need a Savior. I can see clearly that even my best attempts will result in failure. I see Jesus with a new found awe in His perfection and the gift of grace that He extends to me.</div><div><br /></div><div>These were Ann Voskamp's words that say it so well: "Lent gives me this gift: the deeper I know the pit of my sin, the deeper I'll drink the draughts of Joy."</div><div><br /></div><div>Doesn't Jesus say that with different words when He says, "He who is forgiven much loves much."</div><div><br /></div><div>I found this quote on Ann Voskamp's blog. It is by Walter Wangerin, on the subject of why we celebrate Lent when it may not fall into our denominational traditions:</div><div><br /></div><div></div><blockquote><div>"But in the economy of God, what seems the end is but a preparation... The disciles approached the resurrection from their bereavement. For them the death was first, and the death was all. Easter, then was an explosion of newness, a marvelous slitting of heaven indeed.</div><div><br /></div><div>But for us, who return backward into the past, the Resurrection comes first, and through it we view a death with is, therefore, less consuming, less horrible, even less readl. </div><div><br /></div><div>We miss the disciples terrible, wonderful preparation.</div><div><br /></div><div>Unless, as now we attend to the suffering first, to the cross with sincerest pity and vigilant love, to the dying with most faithful care - and thus prepare for joy."</div></blockquote><div></div><div><br /></div><div>Yes, Jesus rose and defeated death and that is central to my faith. I am risen with Christ and there is no part of my salvation that I can boast in because it is all gift. That is made clearer to me even as I attempt to hone areas of my life and fall short time and again. I don't deserve salvation based on anything I have done. I fall short. It's all grace.</div><div><br /></div><div>I do not want to miss the gravity of His death, or my need for His death, as I walk in a "Christ is risen" joy parade. Even the elements of communion, the bread and wine, symbolize this sacrifice and Jesus encouraged us to do it in remembrance of Him. I feel like my kids get this a little better than I do. It never fails that as we read the story of Jesus' death in their Jesus Storybook Bible that they will be moved to tears. They feel that moment of Jesus dying and the pain and sorrow that live in that moment. And I often find myself very quickly saying, "Don't be sad, guys! Jesus rises again! He doesn't stay dead!" But, they get it right. He died. He endured a lot of pain. For me. And, that should be felt deeply because if I don't feel that deeply, then I don't really get the sacrifice of it.</div><div><br /></div><div>So - this season of practicing Lent, for me, is about walking toward Easter with a heart that is bent toward knowing how very much I need this Savior. It is about slowing down so I can see where God is forming me in His image. It's about having eyes to see where I am full of me and doing the work to empty that out to clear space for Him. It is about seeing every day that I need a Savior!</div><div><br /></div><div>I loved how timely my reading from Jesus Calling was the other day. </div><div><br /></div><div><blockquote>"... Your awareness of your constant need of Me is your greatest strength. Your neediness, properly handles, is a link to My Presence. However, there are pitfalls that you must beon guard against: Self-pity, self-preoccupation, giving up. Your inadequacy presents you with a continual choice - deep dependence on Me, or despair. The emptiness you feel within will be filled either with problems or with My Presence. Make me central in your consciousness by praying continually: simple, short prayers flowing out of the present moment. Use My Name liberally, to remind you of My Presence. Keep on asking and you will receive, so that your gladness may be full and complete."</blockquote></div><div><br /></div><div>I hope that you will join me and Amy in this journey. Here is to living with an awareness of how much He loves us and how much we need Him.</div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div>Ali http://www.blogger.com/profile/09903537076363946309noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-584112316194604185.post-6935329766140804512012-02-16T08:22:00.000-08:002012-02-16T09:13:48.811-08:00My Daily Allowance<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh-k6SeAdDTNVww_YUP7kxeawRaMWFgQnpQTCV0GQnKlxf9lQABdETC52Zx8R9OT5Jg_ZtZK7zb_HT4_6_OJrSkQtbdjB42mG0SLP1TqHXFZLl_pirRtfKJGq6sbXoSTT_ce94Hryln2V0/s1600/Screen+Shot+2012-02-16+at+9.09.51+AM.png" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 398px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh-k6SeAdDTNVww_YUP7kxeawRaMWFgQnpQTCV0GQnKlxf9lQABdETC52Zx8R9OT5Jg_ZtZK7zb_HT4_6_OJrSkQtbdjB42mG0SLP1TqHXFZLl_pirRtfKJGq6sbXoSTT_ce94Hryln2V0/s400/Screen+Shot+2012-02-16+at+9.09.51+AM.png" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5709782474841758690" /></a><div style="text-align: center;">[photo: <a href="http://www.artslant.com/global/artists/show/16548-andrea-luna-reece">Andrea Luna Reece</a>]</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div>One of my morsels of daily encouragement is the "Morning & Evening" writings from Charles Spurgeon. I get them in my daily reading plan through my Bible app on my iPhone. Today's was particularly fitting.<br /><blockquote type="cite" style="font-family: Helvetica; font-size: medium; "><div><table width="100%" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" background="http://web-assets.youversion.com/html-email/smartcomm/bg.png" style="line-height: 18px; "><tbody><tr><td style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 21px; "><table align="center" id="main" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" width="460" style="font-family: sans-serif; padding-top: 0px; padding-right: 15px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 15px; "><tbody><tr class="links_list"><td bgcolor="#ffffff" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 44px; border-top-color: rgb(203, 201, 207); border-right-color: rgb(203, 201, 207); border-bottom-color: rgb(203, 201, 207); border-left-color: rgb(203, 201, 207); border-top-style: solid; border-right-style: solid; border-bottom-style: solid; border-left-style: solid; border-top-width: 1px; border-right-width: 1px; border-bottom-width: 1px; border-left-width: 1px; "><ul style="list-style-type: none; list-style-position: initial; list-style-image: initial; padding-top: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; "><li class="additional" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', sans-serif; color: rgb(64, 64, 63); line-height: 21px; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; height: auto; font-size: 15px; "><p style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 21px; margin-right: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-top: 15px; padding-right: 15px; padding-bottom: 15px; padding-left: 15px; border-bottom-width: 1px; border-bottom-style: solid; border-bottom-color: rgb(203, 201, 207); margin-bottom: 0px; "><br />"And his allowance was a continual allowance given him of the king, a daily rate for every day, all the days of his life." -2 Kings 25:30</p><p style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', sans-serif; font-size: 15px; line-height: 21px; margin-right: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-top: 15px; padding-right: 15px; padding-bottom: 15px; padding-left: 15px; border-bottom-width: 1px; border-bottom-style: solid; border-bottom-color: rgb(203, 201, 207); margin-bottom: 0px; "><br /><br />Jehoiachin was not sent away from the king's palace with a store to last him for months, but his provision was given him as a daily pension. Herein he well pictures the happy position of all the Lord's people. A daily portion is all that a man really wants. We do not need tomorrow's supplies; that day has not yet dawned, and its wants are as yet unborn. The thirst which we may suffer in the month of June does not need to be quenched in February, for we do not feel it yet; if we have enough for each day as the days arrive we shall never know want. Sufficient for the day is all that we can enjoy. We cannot eat or drink or wear more than the day's supply of food and raiment; the surplus gives us the care of storing it, and the anxiety of watching against a thief. One staff aids a traveller, but a bundle of staves is a heavy burden. Enough is not only as good as a feast, but is all that the greatest glutton can truly enjoy. This is all that we should expect; a craving for more than this is ungrateful. When our Father does not give us more, we should be content with his daily allowance. Jehoiachin's case is ours, we have a sure portion, a portion given us of the king, a gracious portion, and a perpetual portion. Here is surely ground for thankfulness.<br /><br />Beloved Christian reader, in matters of grace you need a daily supply. You have no store of strength. Day by day must you seek help from above. It is a very sweet assurance that a daily portion is provided for you. In the word, through the ministry, by meditation, in prayer, and waiting upon God you shall receive renewed strength. In Jesus all needful things are laid up for you. Then enjoy your continual allowance. Never go hungry while the daily bread of grace is on the table of mercy.<br /></p></li></ul></td></tr></tbody></table></td></tr></tbody></table><br /></div></blockquote><div><div>These words penetrate deep. </div></div><div><br /></div><div>"A daily portion is all that a man (woman) really wants. We do not need tomorrow's supplies; that day has not yet dawned, and its wants are as yet unborn. The thirst which we may suffer in the month of June does not need to be quenched in February, for we do not feel it yet"</div><div><br /></div><div>How many of my moments of worry are connected to my thoughts of tomorrow and the worries that tomorrow stirs in me. How often have I worried over the thirst that I would have in June while living in the month of February? For it is right now literally February, and I can feel my heart beating quickly if I start to think of June. But, it is February. This may be the secret that our children live - they are living <i>today</i>. This moment. And the reality is that the older we get the more we know of storms that lurk and that the winds can change and this causes worry because we know that there are variables that could change things. But, we have no control over those variables, so why give thought to them?</div><div><br /></div><div>June may indeed be a scorching month with sun beating down heavily and we may indeed be quite thirsty, but I will face that heat when it is directly over head. Today - today is the day that I am walking in and I want to be all in on THIS DAY.</div><div><br /></div><div>"...if we have enough for each day as the days arrive we shall never know want. Sufficient for the day is all we can enjoy. We cannot eat or drink or wear more than the day's supply of food and raiment; the surplus gives us the care of storing it, and the anxiety of watching against a thief..."</div><div><br /></div><div>I think of that moment with Jesus and the crowd of people gathered around him (in Matthew). He can see the worry etched on their faces. My face is there in the crowd too. What if we don't have enough food? What if we don't have enough money? What if his company fails? What if... </div><div>And Jesus, this Jesus, looks at them and His heart is filled with love for them. For me. He sees them as sheep that do not have a shepherd to take care of them. The job of the sheep is just to follow the shepherd to the good pasture, and the safe places and the water. These people looked like lost sheep. So, Jesus shepherds them by painting a picture with words. The people sat on the mountainside and looked out at the glittering lake and took in the surroundings.</div><div><br /></div><div>He points to the birds. Everyone looks to see the birds pecking the ground and eating the seeds that lay in bounty for them. Jesus points out that the birds do not worry or store up seed for tomorrow. They know that there will be seed tomorrow because God takes care of them. </div><div><br /></div><div><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:130%;"><i> "God knows what they need and He feeds them."</i></span></b></div><div><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:130%;"><i><br /></i></span></b></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:100%;">Then He points to the wildflowers. Picture the wildflowers growing around you on a grassy hill. Where do these flowers buy their lovely clothes? Do they make them? Do they work every day so that they can buy them? I can hear that laughter in Jesus' voice as He points out the absurdity of this concept. No - these flowers are clothed by God and not even a king could dress as well as these little gems. </span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:100%;"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:100%;">Jesus declares it loud and clear - YOU ARE MORE IMPORTANT THAT BIRDS! MORE IMPORTANT THAN FLOWERS! They don't sit and worry about things. And God doesn't want His children to worry either. Your Father in heaven knows what you need.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:100%;"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:100%;"><i>Sufficient for the day is all we can enjoy.</i></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:100%;"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:100%;">What has God given me today. For that I am grateful. I am expectant for what He will give me tomorrow. To so many, even to myself as I write this, this is naive. Right? Aren't we supposed to work to prepare for tomorrow. Store up? Retirement, college fund, vacation fund, rainy day fund? Don't get me wrong - there is wisdom in stewarding our resources. But, where the worries begin and the furrowed brow and the anxiety over the what if's begin - it goes against everything God is teaching us through all of scripture. He says He provides. He says one of His names is "Jehovah jireh" - the Lord will provide. He has even provided His son that we would be free from the debt of our sin. How can I trust God for this massive gift of redemption and not trust for little details like food or money? What if the simplicity of enjoying what is before us today - today's bread, today's clothes, today's children, today's husband - what if we could be sheep today and just follow the path that the Shepherd is leading us on. The sheep do not worry about whether they are on the right path, or whether this grass will be there tomorrow. For the shepherd will scoop them up and place them in the right spot if they get off the path. He has that shepherd's staff that he will gently use to push them back into the right place. </span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:100%;"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:100%;">What this season is teaching me is that at the end of me, I can only rely on God. I tell Him all day long. "God, you say you will provide. I trust You to provide. You say you will give wisdom. I trust You for wisdom. You say that You leave Your peace. Bring Your peace. You say You are the GOOD SHEPHERD. Be my Shepherd. Lead me to the still waters and good pasture. You say you will." </span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:100%;"><br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:100%;"><blockquote>How gracious He will be when you cry for help! As soon as He hears, He will answer you. Although the Lord gives you the bread of adversity and the water of affliction, your teachers will be hidden from you no more; with your own eyes you will see them. Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, "This is the way; walk in it." - Isaiah 30:19-21</blockquote><blockquote><br /></blockquote>More than anything, my soul wants to hear the voice of my Shepherd, gently whispering, "This is the way; walk in it."</span></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><blockquote type="cite" style=" ;font-size:medium;"><div style="text-align: -webkit-auto; "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:sans-serif;"><br /></span></div></blockquote></div>Ali http://www.blogger.com/profile/09903537076363946309noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-584112316194604185.post-1202408084640019872012-02-06T22:01:00.000-08:002012-02-06T22:40:44.473-08:00My 2012 Manifesto<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj7j4_WocyPZnv9KSm90swMUWSlA1cWpJeU77SaZMRWMdXnnHGbqYjbBtGtu9ZN2Om2N_CjgYdt_HlWr9XNI05NV3iMMqrJNAwuh8znDGKhkH5hh1VRRKS9qWTJ4uifx-vHeutHiFNtrUBg/s640/quote+dream+dh+lawrence.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 640px; height: 640px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj7j4_WocyPZnv9KSm90swMUWSlA1cWpJeU77SaZMRWMdXnnHGbqYjbBtGtu9ZN2Om2N_CjgYdt_HlWr9XNI05NV3iMMqrJNAwuh8znDGKhkH5hh1VRRKS9qWTJ4uifx-vHeutHiFNtrUBg/s640/quote+dream+dh+lawrence.jpg" border="0" alt="" /></a><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:85%;">[<a href="http://inmybucket.blogspot.com/2010/10/quote-dreams-dh-lawrence.html">source: In My Bucket]</a></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div>A few years ago, a dear friend of mine and I endeavored to launch a new blog called <a href="www.mamamanifesto.com">"Mama Manifesto"</a>. Our hope was that it would be a place for moms to feel connected and not alone in their motherhood journeys. Motherhood had not come easily to either of us, and it had also not been the easiest transition for either of us. We recognized how encouraging it was to say that out loud. So, we dreamt up this space that would hopefully create a safe place for mamas to gather and draw inspiration in a nap-sized moment. That is still our hope.<div><br /></div><div>But, one of the things that we wanted to do for ourselves and others, was encourage a "proactive" way of parenting. That we would not just get caught up in the frustrating cycle of reactive parenting. You know the drill ... the kids are addicted to sugar so they whine for sugar and we cave by giving them sugar, but we truly, truly, truly desire to raise healthy kids who eat well and are nurtured in their bodies. Or, we have a huge desire for our kids to be creative and to live a childhood that is inspired and full of imagination and adventures, but we cannot break the cycle of screen time obsession as we rotate from tv to iPhone to computer to DS to wii to XBox...</div><div><br /></div><div>That is a very tangible example of reactive parenting. The deeper one is that we have these deep desires of <i>who</i> we want to be as women. To our husbands, to our families and maybe even to our neighbors. We know who we WANT to be, and maybe even WHO WE WERE CREATED TO BE. We just are not living that out. I remember working before I had kids and having to sit down in multiple jobs and create a "vision statement" for myself or for the company. We kind of need something like this to keep our actions in line with our desires.</div><div><br /></div><div>So, what is your manifesto for 2012? Who do you want to be to your husband, to your kids, to God, to your neighbors, to your co-workers, to the blogging community? I sat down tonight and in a very stream of consciousness way wrote out my manifesto for 2012. My hope is that as I check back in, that I can identify how my actions need to shift in order to reach these goals. </div><div><br /></div><div>I will share it with you. It comes from my heart. And, I would love to read yours. Would you share it with me?</div><div><br /></div><div> <!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <o:officedocumentsettings> <o:allowpng/> </o:OfficeDocumentSettings> </xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:worddocument> <w:zoom>0</w:Zoom> <w:trackmoves>false</w:TrackMoves> <w:trackformatting/> <w:punctuationkerning/> <w:drawinggridhorizontalspacing>18 pt</w:DrawingGridHorizontalSpacing> <w:drawinggridverticalspacing>18 pt</w:DrawingGridVerticalSpacing> <w:displayhorizontaldrawinggridevery>0</w:DisplayHorizontalDrawingGridEvery> <w:displayverticaldrawinggridevery>0</w:DisplayVerticalDrawingGridEvery> <w:validateagainstschemas/> <w:saveifxmlinvalid>false</w:SaveIfXMLInvalid> <w:ignoremixedcontent>false</w:IgnoreMixedContent> <w:alwaysshowplaceholdertext>false</w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText> <w:compatibility> <w:breakwrappedtables/> <w:dontgrowautofit/> <w:dontautofitconstrainedtables/> <w:dontvertalignintxbx/> </w:Compatibility> </w:WordDocument> </xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:latentstyles deflockedstate="false" latentstylecount="276"> </w:LatentStyles> </xml><![endif]--> <!--[if gte mso 10]> <style> /* Style Definitions */ table.MsoNormalTable {mso-style-name:"Table Normal"; mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0; mso-tstyle-colband-size:0; mso-style-noshow:yes; mso-style-parent:""; mso-padding-alt:0in 5.4pt 0in 5.4pt; mso-para-margin:0in; mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:12.0pt; font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-ascii-font-family:Cambria; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family:Cambria; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;} </style> <![endif]--> <!--StartFragment--> <p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:180%;">My Manifesto | 2012</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight:normal"><span style="font-size:14.0pt;mso-bidi-font-size:12.0pt;">I am passionate about knowing my Father.</span></b><span style="font-size:14.0pt;mso-bidi-font-size:12.0pt;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal">Hearing His voice and walking in tune with His Spirit are the desires of my heart.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal">I endeavor to learn to be still and know that He is God.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal">I endeavor to learn the way of listening and “being” and to share my journey and learnings with as many other “twitchy” souls that I can.</p> <p class="MsoNormal">To walk in a posture of gratitude, receiving each moment as grace and savoring the gifts that are in front of me every single day.</p><p class="MsoNormal">That I would walk the wilderness seasons with hope and expectation of a Father who provides for His children, though His provision may not look the way we want it to. </p> <p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight:normal"><span style="font-size:14.0pt;mso-bidi-font-size:12.0pt;"><br /></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight:normal"><span style="font-size:14.0pt;mso-bidi-font-size:12.0pt;">I am passionate about loving my husband with a true love.</span></b><span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal">A God-breathed and blessed love that serves and honors and puts him first.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal">To be the kind of partner God dreamt of when He smiled to Himself and said, “It is very good.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal">To speak words that are life-giving and to hold him up and build him up, not drain him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal">To pray for him with a steadfast endurance that holds him up to the Father who is shaping him daily.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal">To trust that He is at work on this man, and I need not meddle in His development of this man He first loved and dreamt up.</p> <p class="MsoNormal">To treat him the way I hope my precious son will be treated by my future daughter in law.</p> <p class="MsoNormal">To praise him in front of our children and never speak ill of him in their presence.</p> <p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight:normal"><span style="font-size:14.0pt;mso-bidi-font-size:12.0pt;"><br /></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight:normal"><span style="font-size:14.0pt;mso-bidi-font-size:12.0pt;">I am passionate about loving my children with a true love that reflects God in all His unconditional and steadfast loving ways.</span></b><span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal">That I would model the fruits of the Spirit (love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, gentleness, goodness and self-control) in my moment to moment interactions with them.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal">That I would look at them with love in my eyes and show them through my words and deeds that I am proud to be their mama and they are lovely.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal">That I would teach them how to hear truth and lies and how to fight the lies that they hear with truth.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal">That I would model gratitude, even in times of scarcity.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal">That I would teach them to run this race well - and that does not mean never bearing my aching soul to God.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>- That they would see a Psalmist’s heart in me and know that while I feel hurt and have questions, that I will forever praise the God who has saved me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination:none;mso-layout-grid-align:none; text-autospace:none"><span style="mso-bidi-;font-family:Helvetica;">That I would lean into worshipping God in the midst of highs and lows. That we would be able to say, as a family,</span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:13.0pt;line-height:18.0pt;mso-pagination: none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace:none"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:130%;"><b><span style="font-family: Georgia; font-family:Georgia;">Though the fig tree does not bud</span></b><span style="font-family: Georgia; font-family:Georgia;"> <b>and there are no grapes on the vines,</b><o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:13.0pt;line-height:18.0pt;mso-pagination: none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace:none"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:130%;"><b><span style="font-family:Georgia;mso-bidi-font-family:Georgia;">though the olive crop fails </span></b><span style="font-family:Georgia;mso-bidi-font-family:Georgia;"> <b>and the fields produce no food,</b><o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:13.0pt;line-height:18.0pt;mso-pagination: none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace:none"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:130%;"><b><span style="font-family:Georgia;mso-bidi-font-family:Georgia;">though there are no sheep in the pen</span></b><span style="font-family:Georgia; mso-bidi-font-family:Georgia;"> <b>and no cattle in the stalls,</b><o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:13.0pt;line-height:18.0pt;mso-pagination: none;mso-layout-grid-align:none;text-autospace:none"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:130%;"><b><span style="font-family:Georgia;mso-bidi-font-family:Georgia;">yet I will rejoice in the LORD,</span></b><span style="font-family:Georgia; mso-bidi-font-family:Georgia;"> <b>I will be joyful in God my Savior</b>.<o:p></o:p></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="mso-bidi-;font-family:Helvetica;">That they would learn that He is our God in times of plenty and times of scarcity. He is worthy of praise and worship in all of these moments, and we would lead them down a hopeful highway of praise. </span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="mso-bidi-;font-family:Helvetica;">That they would remember us singing out praises even with empty barns, unyielding trees, and broken hearts that are being mended by the Creator’s nail pierced hands.<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="mso-bidi-;font-family:Helvetica;">That I would cheer them on as they praise in the midst of pain. <o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="mso-bidi-;font-family:Helvetica;">That I would nurture their creativity, health, souls and minds.<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="mso-bidi-;font-family:Helvetica;">That I would <a href="http://www.mamamanifesto.com/2008/09/my-favorite-days.html">never stop telling them the miraculous story of their creation and that they are my “Red Sea” moment.</a><o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="mso-bidi-;font-family:Helvetica;">That they would know that even if God told me I could pick any children in the whole entire world to be mine, that I would choose them.<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="mso-bidi-;font-family:Helvetica;"><o:p> </o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight:normal"><span style="font-size:14.0pt;mso-bidi-mso-bidi-font-family:Helvetica;font-size:12.0pt;"><br /></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight:normal"><span style="font-size:14.0pt;mso-bidi-mso-bidi-font-family:Helvetica;font-size:12.0pt;">I am passionate about loving my community and neighbors with a shepherding love.<o:p></o:p></span></b></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="mso-bidi-;font-family:Helvetica;">That I would walk through my neighborhood a little bit slower and really “see” my neighbors.<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="mso-bidi-;font-family:Helvetica;">That I would not be so busy in my to do lists that I miss the moments to share God’s love with those around me in an authentic and tangible way.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>...Sitting with them as they confess the anxiety over their autistic son's future. ...Praying with them for hope and joy and fighting for a perspective of God that is bigger than the now. ...Coloring with the littles and opening my home for messy play dates.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>...Being willing to have the home where they can come with questions and sit on my barstools and talk for hours (my mom did this well). ...Rallying alongside of the single mothers who are stretched and tired.<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="mso-bidi-;font-family:Helvetica;">That we would be a “House of Prayer”.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>-God lead the hurting and broken hearts to our door and anoint this home as a haven for the broken.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Teach us to pray so that You hear and You come and You heal (souls and bodies).<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="mso-bidi-;font-family:Helvetica;">That I would not be afraid to be “this person” in my community.<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="mso-bidi-;font-family:Helvetica;">That I would love the many children in this neighborhood and see them with God’s eyes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>-That I would hope daily in prayer for them to be set free from entitlement and brokenness that plagues our generation and the generations to come.<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="mso-bidi-;font-family:Helvetica;">That I would indeed share the good news with the poor in spirit, bind up the brokenhearted, and proclaim freedom for the captives and release from darkness for the prisoners.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>(Isaiah 61)<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="mso-bidi-;font-family:Helvetica;">That I would help women battling anxiety, despair, depression and feeling so alone walk in freedom and joy. (He gives beauty for ashes, oil of gladness for mourning, and a garment of praise instead of despair.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>Isaiah 61)<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="mso-bidi-;font-family:Helvetica;">That there would be an entire generation that are called “oaks of righteousness, a planting of the Lord for the display of His splendor” (Isaiah 61:3) that begin as seedlings at <a href="http://kwavs.blogspot.com/">our KWAV’s meetings.</a><o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="mso-bidi-;font-family:Helvetica;">That we would stand in solidarity with the poor, the widows and orphans and people fighting injustice in our local community and be peacemakers (physical and spiritual).<o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="mso-bidi-;font-family:Helvetica;"><o:p> </o:p></span>I envision nights of prayer and worship.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I envision community meals.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I envision multiple discipleship groups for men and women.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I envision home groups that are the highlight of everyone’s weeks because they cannot wait to love and be loved.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I envision mentoring for teens.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I envision families on mission trips together.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I envision retreats for soul care and discovery.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </span>I envision Jesus changing lives.</p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="mso-bidi-;font-family:Helvetica;"><o:p> </o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="mso-bidi-;font-family:Helvetica;"><o:p> </o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><span style="mso-bidi-;font-family:Helvetica;"><o:p> </o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> </o:p></p> <!--EndFragment--></div><br /><a href="http://img2.etsystatic.com/il_570xN.181752330.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 560px; height: 700px;" src="http://img2.etsystatic.com/il_570xN.181752330.jpg" border="0" alt="" /></a><div style="text-align: center;">[<a href="http://www.etsy.com/listing/58502088/my-grace-is-sufficient-for-you2?ref=sr_gallery_2&ga_search_query=scripture+wall+art&ga_page=2&ga_search_type=handmade&ga_facet=handmade&show_panel=true">source: etsy</a>]</div><div>Do I feel equipped to live this out? </div><div>Me? </div><div>No. I am a mess. I am a gal who has to breathe out the words, "I trust You" over and over as I endeavor to walk in a path of peace. I am a wife who has to bite her tongue not to criticize. I am a mom who loses patience over and over. I am a selfish neighbor who often just wants to stay inside in my cozies and paint and sew and not talk to anyone. But, I am taking God at His word these days. That He shows up in our weakest moments and I am going to rely on that power to be what I need to take ground this year. </div>Ali http://www.blogger.com/profile/09903537076363946309noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-584112316194604185.post-61344572249147345342012-02-05T09:26:00.000-08:002016-10-14T17:04:47.258-07:00my name is hopeIn <a href="http://leaningin.blogspot.com/2012/02/stepping-back-in.html">yesterday's post</a>, I shared a bit about the "wilderness" season I am in. There have been some amazing resources that have served me really, really well in this time. I have to give the disclaimer that while I have always been a bit of a melancholy soul, the last couple years of our life have been a pressure cooker for that melancholy. I have struggled with anxiety amidst the petri dish that is my life. These resources have been so, so eye opening and helpful for me.<br />
<div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
I'd love to share them with you. If you are walking in your own wilderness season, I think these could be resourceful for you:</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<ul>
<li><a href="http://www.amazon.com/One-Thousand-Gifts-Fully-Right/dp/0310321913/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1328420652&sr=1-1">One Thousand Gifts</a> - by Ann Voskamp. It seems like the entire world knows about this book, and yet, I continue to give copies to people who have never heard of it. It is amazing. Amazing, amazing, amazing. Like re-read 5 times in a row amazing (I have!). Read out loud passages to anyone in the room amazing (my husband has fallen in love with it too!). It has changed my life and, next to the Bible, has been the most impactful book I have read in my Christian journey. </li>
<li><a href="http://www.amazon.com/Jesus-Calling-Enjoying-Peace-Presence/dp/1591451884/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1328420685&sr=1-1">Jesus Calling</a>, by Sara Young. As I shared yesterday, this is one of the ways I start every day. I read the day's passage and journal about it and the verses that go with it. It is a true gift to me. Each day feels as though it was written just for me. The funny thing is, nearly every other person I know who also reads this book feels the same way. We also read the Jesus Calling for kids with our kids before we hit the road for school. Love it too.</li>
<li><a href="http://www.amazon.com/My-Name-Hope-depression-melancholy/dp/0615565654/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1328420739&sr=1-1">My name is Hope</a>, by John Mark Comer. My husband and I were able to get away for a few days last weekend and visit Portland, OR. It was a gift of a weekend on so many levels. One of the huge gifts in it was that we got to attend an amazing church called <a href="http://www.ajesuschurch.org/">Solid Rock Church</a>. John Mark Comer is the lead pastor there and we were blessed to get to hear him teach Part 3 of a <a href="http://www.ajesuschurch.org/topic?id=875&c=1190">series titled "my name is Hope".</a> His book was written as his way of sharing all he has learned about walking with anxiety and depression, and more importantly, walking victoriously along side of anxiety and depression. This message series and book will indeed bless many people. If you are in a season that is stretching you in this regard, I would pull up a seat and<a href="http://www.ajesuschurch.org/topic?id=875&c=1190"> watch the videos.</a> Order the book. My favorite quote was, "Anxiety is momentary atheism." Ouch. So true. If my worries are eclipsing my trust in God, I am not really trusting God, right? Get ready to do battle - you have a fight ahead of you. But, you will have the tools to wage a Bourne Identity level fight. Or maybe a Sidney Bristow level fight. You choose. Just kick some booty.</li>
<li>"<a href="http://www.marinerschurch.org/messagesmedia/messages/irvine-worship-ctr/1662-2012-01-29-at-the-end-of-our-rope">At the end of my rope</a>", by Mike Erre. This is a message taught by Mike Erre, a pastor at Mariner's church. I listened to this message via podcast the other day (you can download it in iTunes if you search Mariner's Church in the store. Look for "at the end of my rope" for the Irvine Campus). God has clearly gifted this friend of mine to teach His word! It is courage for the weary soul and hope for anyone who feels like they have more than they can handle on their plate. You just might have more than you can handle. And, what Mike asserts is that God is actually in the business of giving us more than we can handle so that we have to rely on Him. Pull up a seat and <a href="http://www.marinerschurch.org/messagesmedia/messages/irvine-worship-ctr/1662-2012-01-29-at-the-end-of-our-rope">watch the video</a> if you have the time today. You will be glad you did.</li>
</ul>
<div>
My hope is that these will encourage you wherever you are. Encourage means <b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 130%;"><i>to pour courage into</i></span></b>, so may courage be poured into your heart, mind and soul.</div>
</div>
</div>
Ali http://www.blogger.com/profile/09903537076363946309noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-584112316194604185.post-56941288997583077972012-02-04T14:50:00.000-08:002012-02-04T15:54:34.435-08:00stepping back in<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgyWpYBrWscO7kaohRyaSju1n53I7b1V6ZccMkmF-OnxCiS5x7FOwEW-jxaJ1ysIgdq-U6Fuqi1n-Zi4h1WYdCf7E8cBSyoV9acMa-_jpcMaOvey-ZS3qDwa2QCl6w-xxTIFB-ocpjCGvY/s1600/photo.JPG" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgyWpYBrWscO7kaohRyaSju1n53I7b1V6ZccMkmF-OnxCiS5x7FOwEW-jxaJ1ysIgdq-U6Fuqi1n-Zi4h1WYdCf7E8cBSyoV9acMa-_jpcMaOvey-ZS3qDwa2QCl6w-xxTIFB-ocpjCGvY/s400/photo.JPG" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5705432018158202450" /></a><div style="text-align: center;">[the proud smile of a boy who lost his first tooth]</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div>It has been a while since I have written my heart out here. I have always been a "writer". As a child my days would be spent writing lists, stories, letters, love notes to my mom and dad, apology notes that I would slip under my brother's door when we were in time outs (he would often tear them up and slip them back under mine, prompting tears and lament), and journaling. In my college years, journaling became my peaceful place. The place where I could process life and ponder all of those deep parts of life that I was diving into. I still journal daily. It is a huge part of my daily quiet time. <div><br /></div><div>My latest "quiet time" routine is waking up before my kids, which if you know my daughter, you know that this is EARLY. It is a discipline because I love my cozy bed, but this time has become honey for my soul. And, this is a season where my soul needs every drop of honey it can get.</div><div><br /><div>I sit down with my journal, my Bible, and a copy of the book Jesus Calling. I start by reading a couple Psalms. They settle me in a way that I cannot explain. I often feel like a tortured soul - I feel everything pretty deeply and I process everything (if not out loud, then in my head). And, these fellas who wrote the Psalms make me feel like I am in good company. Any scriptures that stand out get copied into my journal, and then beneath them I begin to list what is truth in that passage. Then, I list how those truths impact me now - in the moment and in this season. </div></div><div><br /></div><div>Next, I go to the day's Jesus Calling passage and I look up the scriptures connected to that days passage. I copy those into my journal and do the same thing - write what I know to be truth and what it says about God/Jesus. Then, I write what this means to ME. </div><div><br /></div><div>At this point, I try to sit for a few minutes and just listen. I recently heard an amazing woman speak on prayer who gave the analogy of sitting down to lunch with a dear friend and having so much to share, but saying, "You go first." I try to say to God, "You go first. I know you have something to say to me and I want to listen." This is a super hard discipline for me. Super. HARD. I am such a do-er. I am twitchy. It is hard for me to sit still. Really, really hard to quiet my mind. It takes a lot of prayer and discipline to sit still and listen. But, I am at a place in my life where I feel a bit like a toddler who has this amazing mother who is going to hold me still until I stop flailing. My soul feels a bit like a flailing toddler sometimes and God comes near and holds me still. It is painful but I am committed to learning to be still.</div><div><br /></div><div>Lastly, I pray. I write my prayers. I write my thanks and my fears and my questions and my ponderings. Sometimes it feels like I write my guts out. Lately, I have felt like that is the only writing I can do. When it came to sitting down to blog, I was just so uninspired. I treated it as a sabbatical and felt that I would know when I was supposed to sit back down and blog. Today was that day. I was so inspired by <a href="http://www.hespeaksinthesilence.com/">another woman's story and willingness to share her journey</a> that it hit me that this journey of mine just may resonate with others. There is courage found when we feel that we are not alone. Isn't it comforting to commiserate with other mamas about sleep deprivation? You walk away feeling <i>normal</i>. Because in the darkness of that room, with the crying baby and the heavy eyes, you do feel so alone, don't you. You feel like you must be the only mom who cannot get her baby to sleep and you wonder what is wrong with you or this baby. But, in the light of day - in that moment where you hear the TRUTH that you are not alone - there is a special kind of freedom. That has always been my favorite thing about blogging. I love the tips and recipes and ideas, but it is this moment of soulful humanity connection that I love more than anything. </div><div><br /></div><div>So - I am committed to writing a bit more. My hope is that out of this story of mine, other souls will take courage. More importantly, as God's hope shines out of this story of mine, others will take courage in leaning into this same God. </div><div><br /></div><div>Where I am right now is "stretched". I am stretched to the place that feels like the end of my rope. And, I am learning that the end of my rope is where God lives. We are in a place of transition, and it feels a bit like we are the Israelites wandering through the desert. I read this passage from Psalm 105 the other day:</div><div><br /></div><div><blockquote></blockquote></div><blockquote><div>"...He spread out a cloud as a covering, and a fire to give light at night.</div><div>They asked, and he brought them quail and satisfied them with the bread of heaven.</div><div>He opened the rock and water gushed out;</div><div>like a river it flowed in the desert.</div><div>For He remembered His holy promise given to his servant Abraham.</div><div>He brought out His people with rejoicing,</div><div>His chosen ones with shouts of joy;</div><div>He gave them the lands of the nations, </div><div>and they fell heir to what others had toiled for -</div><div>that they might keep His precepts and observe His laws." - vs 39-45</div><div></div></blockquote><div><br /></div><div>This passage has God's faithfulness all over it. He led His people through the wilderness with this cloud by day and fire by night. He provided food and water for them. He eventually leads them to the promised land - land that they did not toil over.</div><div><br /></div><div>But, they were wandering in the desert for a long time. If you know the story of the Israelites you know that they live this sort of schizophrenic posture of gratitude and angst. Hmmm, sounds familiar. For in my own life, I live these moments of gratitude and recognition that God is here and is providing for our daily needs. But, the angst is lurking there too - when I look ahead of the cloud covering today or the fire lighting up this moment - it's darkness ahead. In that darkness fear and uncertainty lurk. I see that faith journey that the Israelites were taken on, and how they were walking behind God's very presence as a guide both day and night. I am sure that they had to fight to keep their eyes in the moment or they would freak out. The view of the wilderness stretching before them was staggering, I am sure. I love how this passage says, "They asked and He brought them quail and satisfied them with the bread of heaven."</div><div><br /></div><div>Wow. It is my prayer that my heart and mind would have an aching bent towards God's precepts and laws and desires. That I would see when my eyes wander from the cloud and fire. God is leading us in our own "wilderness" and we are seeing His hand in our lives daily in radical ways. He is the same God who leads, protects, and provides for His peoples' needs.</div><div><br /></div><div>That is the truth. I have to wash my mind daily in that truth.</div><div><br /></div><div>My sweet son recently lost his first tooth. It was so loose that when he would eat it would wreak all sorts of havoc on him and he was in pain. It was time for that baby to come out. He attempted pulling it out himself, but then in tears announced that he really wanted his Papa to help him pull it out.</div><div><br /></div><div>They sat on the couch - Callen straddling my husband as he wiggled that tooth and gently worked on getting it out. Man, that tooth was stubborn. It did not want to come out. I could tell my husband was a bit flabbergasted at how long it was taking. My son sat there with tears streaming down his face, breathing through the pain, watching his Papa stare into his mouth with fingers twisting and pulling.</div><div><br /></div><div>In the midst of it, Callen reaches up and grabs Drew's face and with his two hands cupping his daddy's face, says:</div><div><br /></div><div></div><blockquote><div>"Papa, thank you for helping me. </div><div> I am brave, but I need your help. </div><div> And, this is exciting."</div><div></div></blockquote><div><br /></div><div>All of this is said with tears streaming down his face. We choked back our own tears and affirmed him for his bravery and told him it was our privilege to help him. (This boy is such a gift and precious sweet spot in our days!)</div><div><br /></div><div>Eventually, the tooth came out and there was a pretty huge celebration because it was quite the labor of love.</div><div><br /></div><div>The next morning, I was in the kitchen finishing up my quiet time and I had this feeling of frustration at the wilderness journey that we are in. I feel ready to be to the end of it. God very gently nudged my mind back to the moment on the couch and spoke these words to my heart:</div><div><br /></div><div></div><blockquote><div>"Ali, you are on my lap. Your tooth is loose but it is not an easy one to pull out. I am holding you and I am helping you. You ARE brave, and it will come out. Just rest on my lap and let me help you. Thank me for helping you. And, this is exciting."</div><div></div></blockquote><div>Humbly, I look to His face with tears streaming down mine. Thankful for His lap. Thankful for His hands. Thankful for His help. And, thankful for this journey that <i>is exciting</i> and teaching me so much.</div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div>Ali http://www.blogger.com/profile/09903537076363946309noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-584112316194604185.post-26479419765300724342011-01-10T20:33:00.000-08:002011-01-10T20:35:09.046-08:00I can hardly stand it<div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div>Seriously.<div><br /></div><div>I can hardly even stand it. <a href="http://ashleyannphotography.com/blog/">This amazingly talented gal</a> makes me swoon nearly every day when I visit her blog. My blog should be retitled as "What Ashley Said Yesterday". She is just that amazing.</div><div><br /></div><div>She recently put together <a href="http://ashleyannphotography.com/blog/2011/01/10/diy-the-best-of-my-days-notepad-2011/">this gift idea</a> that serves as a daily calendar/notepad that very simply records the best of your days through out the year. It hits all my hot buttons: gratitude, reflection, pausing for a moment, simple (!!), easy to create and maintain, etc. </div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 291px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiiW8KOAgeaga0Xd-4zVvIE-iRREk2SYTnSgigU-ZyDqPa1aDiuiKhMH-cdeWZgHaQX3KK1p67DDkTn9ug9loEuocE4oiTOw_G_Urdm4iEz9kCM9nloaT0Y5Bj1mzNfHYNlwBicPrsJCJo/s320/Picture+6.png" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5560781045780129986" /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;">[source: ashley anne]</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:small;"><br /></span></div><div>And, being the super quality woman that she is, she is sharing her template with all of us so that we can make them too. What a wonderful gift for a New Year's party (i know, just a little late for that!). I am making these for my kids, hubby and I tomorrow. I have to admit that I am seriously bothered by the fact that we are already on day 10 of January. I may have us go back through our calendar to try to remember the best of those days, just to appease the perfectionist in me. </div><div><br /></div><div>Before you do anything else, <a href="http://ashleyannphotography.com/blog/2011/01/10/diy-the-best-of-my-days-notepad-2011/">click on this link</a> and go download the template to make this for yourself or someone you love. You are guaranteed to put a little happy in their day.</div><div><br /></div><div>Just in case you see this post, Ashley - thank you for sharing your amazing ideas with the internet. You are a beautiful picture of the Proverbs 31 woman and your children will surely arise and call you blessed. xo</div>Ali http://www.blogger.com/profile/09903537076363946309noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-584112316194604185.post-57569597662066017082011-01-05T12:33:00.001-08:002011-01-05T12:33:38.102-08:00Pita Pizzas<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEig43ju_TVFZwA9cv1uI1W4oLotnwYPK2Ppp1LsPLIDAtlFydMhwfxfV8T7qZJtFilTm7X7xVUxdTG9aivkf6N4Gz37JzikZqrFjFzol0YBO-CnmUXZtMxHWDd3j5es9_POrc1hRXLR7AQ/s1600/Picture+2.png"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 264px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEig43ju_TVFZwA9cv1uI1W4oLotnwYPK2Ppp1LsPLIDAtlFydMhwfxfV8T7qZJtFilTm7X7xVUxdTG9aivkf6N4Gz37JzikZqrFjFzol0YBO-CnmUXZtMxHWDd3j5es9_POrc1hRXLR7AQ/s400/Picture+2.png" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5558801599414488674" /></a><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div>Over Christmas break we discovered a new favorite way to make personal pizzas. We are big on pizza here in our house. I constantly crave <a href="http://www.mamamanifesto.com/2010/07/pizza-with-caramelized-onion-and.html">this whole - wheat goat cheese, proscuitto, and carmelized onion pizza.</a> My kids, however, are fans of the kiddo fave - cheese pizza, or if they are living really dangerously, cheese and pepperoni.<br /><br />Enter a new way to prepare pizza - on pita bread. How have I never heard of this before?<br /><br /><div>Ingredients:</div><div><br /></div><div>whole-wheat round pita breads (1 per pizza)</div><div>sauce of choice (my kids love a basic marinara, but get creative and try olive oil or an alfredo sauce)</div><div>cheese of choice</div><div>toppings of choice</div><div><br /></div><div>1. Heat oven to 425 degrees. I think it works best when you place the pita breads in the oven for a few minutes to toast the underside prior to putting toppings on, but if you don't mind your pizza not having a crisp crust, you can forego the toasting.</div><div>2. Build your pizza with sauce and toppings of choice. This is the kids favorite step!</div><div>3. Place pizzas in the oven on a cookie sheet (line with parchment paper to save yourself some clean up).</div><div>4. Let cook for 5-10 minutes until cheese is melted on top and ready to eat.</div><div> Enjoy!</div><div><br /></div><div>My brilliant sister shared this new way to make pizzas with me. In the summer they build their pizzas and pop them right onto the grill for cooking. What a fun summertime party idea! Trader Joe's sells mini pita breads (about the size of a silver dollar) - I am excited to make little mini pizzas as a snack. </div><div><br /></div>Ali http://www.blogger.com/profile/09903537076363946309noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-584112316194604185.post-7169223611773862272010-12-15T13:57:00.000-08:002010-12-15T13:57:00.654-08:00Speaking of traditions<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://ny-image1.etsy.com/il_570xN.186154669.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 570px; height: 694px;" src="http://ny-image1.etsy.com/il_570xN.186154669.jpg" border="0" alt="" /></a><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;">[Find this adorable stocking <a href="http://www.etsy.com/listing/59816107/glittery-christmas-stocking-pink-rose?ref=sr_list_1&ga_search_query=christmasstockings&ga_search_type=handmade&ga_page=&order=&includes%5B0%5D=tags&includes%5B1%5D=title&filter%5B0%5D=handmade">here</a>!]</span></div>Yesterday I shared our Gratitude Box tradition.<br /><br />This year we will be adopting <a href="http://racheldenbow.blogspot.com/2010/12/home-for-holidays-ashley-campbells.html">this tradition</a> that Ashley Anne shared.<div><br /></div><div>I cannot wait to write those notes for my kids' stockings.</div>Ali http://www.blogger.com/profile/09903537076363946309noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-584112316194604185.post-70334512414638475362010-12-14T13:43:00.001-08:002010-12-14T13:43:42.554-08:00Our Gratitude Box<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://www.axisimexinc.com/images/items/md/WFCB5-E010-S5.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 153px; height: 250px;" src="http://www.axisimexinc.com/images/items/md/WFCB5-E010-S5.jpg" border="0" alt="" /></a><br />We launched a new tradition in our home last year. Not only did we take on this new tradition in our home, but I gave it as a gift to several other families in our life. <div><br /></div><div>As I reflect on the past few years, I can recognize that one of the greatest themes in my life over this time has been learning to be more thankful. I am learning to stop, to pause, to reflect, to meditate on the lovely. It has been a powerful thing in my life. I believe gratitude has the power to change our world. </div><div><br /></div><div>So, in an effort to create space for reflection and focused gratitude in our family, I put together a "Gratitude Box". </div><div><br /></div><div>I took shipping tags from Office Depot and numbered them 1 -15, one for every year of our marriage (we just celebrated our 12th year anniversary in August - woo hoo!). </div><div><br /></div><div>And, over the weeks leading up to Christmas last year, my husband and I went through the years of our marriage together and chose something significant from each year to mark that year. We have tried to attach an object or photo to each of the tags that is connected to the year's memory, but we also write a brief description of what and why it is significant on the shipping tag. </div><div><br /></div><div>We have our babies' hospital ID bracelets attached to the years that they entered our lives. </div><div><br /></div><div>We have the key from our first house.</div><div><br /></div><div>We have a Bible verse that was plastered all over our house to remind us to meditate on the lovely in the midst of a truly dark season, among other objects and tokens that help tell the story of our life as a family. </div><div><br /></div><div>It was such a powerful thing for Drew and I to sit and reflect on our journey as a family, and how blessed we are, and also on the highs and lows that we have weathered together. </div><div><br /></div><div>Our tradition is that this is the last "gift" that we open on Christmas, and as a family we will unpack the box and look at the concrete examples of favor and blessing and peace and joy that are woven in our story. I hope that this will become a highlight of my children's Christmas traditions, and that in the years to come, we will choose our year's markers together. I hope that one day when my kids get married, that this will be a gift that I can give to them - an empty box that is theirs to fill with treasured momentos that help them reflect on God's gifts to them.</div><div><br /><br /></div><div>I think that this could also be a lovely Thanksgiving or New Year's tradition. I plan on making it a gift that I give to couples who are getting married. I just know in my own life, that if I do not deliberately open my eyes wide enough to see the beauty in my history, and to purposefully choose to respond with gratitude, that I am missing out. </div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 300px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjt11q-tVwwKaiOCt3A7qcCY3UOxJM77Ske16zsarU4V0R7IC92U-adt2ZVb9kIM7TBPK2wSyAwDqmqZ26JKMbhqLfDmChsp78qVmnAiMUnQnslziWOtDPMf-JArkq8FPxV6E1C1Du96Uo/s400/IMG_1941.JPG" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5282894520253877026" /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div>As a gift, I put together a collection of shipping tags, with numbers to mark their years. I like the metal boxes from IKEA, or the fabric covered boxes from Waverly that are sold at Target or TJ Maxx stores. I embellished the tags with some scrapbooking scraps to add a little flair and then fastened them together with D-rings sold at office supply stores. </div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div>I also printed this to go in the box:</div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEirmNcjj4QKBEgOLo4EpzRy3yODRvla6wA2hswaimHM1fSD626IjyxgRinS8I44oi7Gs3qA2_3IJBc9agcc0lhNO2Hh8ktHobAT2sZYe2slE3F-Y6xwdBkpInEhYgx_DP-YmxFAMcl5818/s1600-h/Picture+2.png"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 241px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEirmNcjj4QKBEgOLo4EpzRy3yODRvla6wA2hswaimHM1fSD626IjyxgRinS8I44oi7Gs3qA2_3IJBc9agcc0lhNO2Hh8ktHobAT2sZYe2slE3F-Y6xwdBkpInEhYgx_DP-YmxFAMcl5818/s400/Picture+2.png" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5282886365726008882" /></a><br /></div><div>Do you have any Christmas traditions that are focused on gratitude? What Christmas traditions are you hoping that your children will continue once they are off in families of their own?</div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div>Ali http://www.blogger.com/profile/09903537076363946309noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-584112316194604185.post-75392705581012699302010-11-10T15:51:00.000-08:002010-11-10T15:55:20.893-08:00Weekly Goals<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi6-cl1cu8Z3zbMGmT1pJ337zW27tes03cf8Yl22yFrG3xZYKdUEoyJqehBHxw2jVPmsO67y9mhtDOUBj5UVu9GwAYHKE1FESIFJLZXuv6f2CEy_RSxcUztndkNRIo9u04brHJ70ZWHDJU/s1600/WeeklyGoalsTemplate.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 257px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi6-cl1cu8Z3zbMGmT1pJ337zW27tes03cf8Yl22yFrG3xZYKdUEoyJqehBHxw2jVPmsO67y9mhtDOUBj5UVu9GwAYHKE1FESIFJLZXuv6f2CEy_RSxcUztndkNRIo9u04brHJ70ZWHDJU/s400/WeeklyGoalsTemplate.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5538072850414875058" /></a><br />I think one of the most common things I hear from fellow mamas is how much we all struggle with the un-ending to do list that comes with the territory of motherhood and kids underfoot. I have often described it as feeling like I am living out the plot of Groundhog Day - you know, where the same day starts over and over. Same tasks. Same snacks. Same dishes. Same chores. Same fights. Same. Same. Same.<div><br /></div><div>It just is what it is. I don't think we can escape it. We will have a lot of mundane tasks, and we will probably end each day feeling like we did not really complete any one of them. </div><div><br /></div><div>I saw <a href="http://ashleyannphotography.com/blog/2010/11/05/goals-how-to-make-em-and-break-em/">this post over at Under the Sycamore</a> and immediately thought, "AHA! That is a great tool for me." The whole idea of having weekly goals is brilliant! Because I have my daily grind goals that seem to suck up the time, and the name of the game in this season of life seems to be INTENTIONALITY. I have to be intentional with everything I want to do. My husband and I may really want to carve out some solo time, but if we are not intentional about it, it ain't gonna happen. Kristen and I have been talking a lot lately about how easy it is to all of the sudden realize that you aren't really connected to your peeps anymore. Life can sweep through and all of the sudden it has been a month or so since you have really connected with friends or other families that you care about.</div><div><br /></div><div>The same thing is true for my goals that I would certainly like to accomplish. When Ashley Anne was writing about her goals I felt some serious mama solidarity.</div><div><br /></div><div>So, I have put together a little Weekly Goals template for myself. Feel free to use. I loved the 4 categories so much that Ashely shared that I copied them. They are Home Organization (I'll be tackling my pesky linen cupboard this week), Project Completion (finishing my daughter's preschool scrapbook seems like a good one, since she is now in 1st grade), Something for Someone Else (love this idea of weekly planning how we can love on someone else), and Each Kid (this one makes my heart sigh because I desperately need to be intentional with doing something with or for each kiddo of mine every week. This week I am taking my girlie on a date, and my hubby is taking my son on a date.)</div><div><br /></div><div>I know that there will be weeks (probably more than not) where I will not accomplish these goals. But, at least I am starting my week with them on my mind and working at that intentionality piece to the equation.</div><div><br /></div><div>There is a lot to be learned about surrenduring to the beauty that is found in the mundane. </div><div><br /></div><div>I continue to push forward.</div>Ali http://www.blogger.com/profile/09903537076363946309noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-584112316194604185.post-10908962745705591032010-11-10T07:56:00.000-08:002016-10-14T17:00:40.235-07:0010 on 10I love when other bloggers post their 10 on 10. I have intended to begin doing it many times. Just like I intend to make photo books for every year of our marriage. Today was a good day to start.<br />
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
What is "10 on 10"? Heather Mattos, from <a href="http://our3cs.blogspot.com/">Cookie Mondays</a>, summarized it beautifully:</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><em>Take a photo every hour for ten consecutive hours on the tenth of each month. Document a day of your life and find beauty among the ordinary moments!</em></span></div>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><i><br /></i></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;">Typically, the idea here is to document a whole day's worth of photos in one post. Inspiration to remember to capture simple, everyday moments and record them, as well!</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><br /></span></div>
</div>
<div>
Today at Mama Manifesto we took on a collaborative 10 on 10. Kind of a view into the moments of many mamas days. <a href="http://www.mamamanifesto.com/2010/11/ten-on-ten.html">Visit and check it out</a>. And, link up your own 10 on 10, if you do it.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Here is my 10 on 10 ...</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgekPqyD0KqZ34lMTnAQ2evSjhyphenhyphen9EAgk-ZFMIXcqXLvkIFAu00o20y1EnSxyLDuCgqZDcbE5s2ROWcp3h8sST20PZuW_THmojkboEq1LtK3h6c2kgRO4ePM3pW67vy0lowWnDP70diPaSs/s1600/photo.JPG" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5537953241774289170" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgekPqyD0KqZ34lMTnAQ2evSjhyphenhyphen9EAgk-ZFMIXcqXLvkIFAu00o20y1EnSxyLDuCgqZDcbE5s2ROWcp3h8sST20PZuW_THmojkboEq1LtK3h6c2kgRO4ePM3pW67vy0lowWnDP70diPaSs/s400/photo.JPG" style="cursor: hand; cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 400px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 400px;" /></a><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;">9 am:</span> Morning cuddles on the couch, as we consider good name choices for his stuffed animals. "Owlie" is pictured here. Owlie has a lot of questions, most of which are: <span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-large;">"Who?"</span><br />
<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgvkwFGWu3GxdQjSqlC8nuYJ6dFdC2GdeKP9ssT4KXBZzeqQfowaNR4d1f9gctfMuaMr0X6wvTDAC3NmXeKpAkX6klihSHYqb_ydFOQQBIRg27cvnM5NvDiEsKWFmZ78S4QhdN9_F8CGr4/s1600/photo.JPG" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5537953233369192562" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgvkwFGWu3GxdQjSqlC8nuYJ6dFdC2GdeKP9ssT4KXBZzeqQfowaNR4d1f9gctfMuaMr0X6wvTDAC3NmXeKpAkX6klihSHYqb_ydFOQQBIRg27cvnM5NvDiEsKWFmZ78S4QhdN9_F8CGr4/s400/photo.JPG" style="cursor: hand; cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 400px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 400px;" /></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">10 am:</span> Returning decor items from a fundraising event for <a href="http://www.blogger.com/www.nuruinternational.org">Nuru International</a> to IKEA. There was ice cream. We were happy.<br />
<br />
<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgZJFhIQk961plMhOQnBxNWslbR4kthFpjxbfFa7mtLc5fwimKONSiKJ7onCopO0yZcsmK0lLCojSwdY-D0MpcjtdX0uNnwfWLbIUkXa-d8RN2bJ1pUn9Gspe-4w4wjCL8kQmhyphenhyphenNJ62A0k/s1600/photo.JPG" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5537953225905560466" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgZJFhIQk961plMhOQnBxNWslbR4kthFpjxbfFa7mtLc5fwimKONSiKJ7onCopO0yZcsmK0lLCojSwdY-D0MpcjtdX0uNnwfWLbIUkXa-d8RN2bJ1pUn9Gspe-4w4wjCL8kQmhyphenhyphenNJ62A0k/s400/photo.JPG" style="cursor: hand; cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 400px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 400px;" /></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">11 am:</span> A quick errand at Paper Source, paper heaven. I love this place. I could spend hours looking at every little thing here. I got some japanese masking tape for a craft project. Callen and I played "I Spy" to keep him from juggling the fun Christmas goodies.<br />
<br />
<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi6XjIvMmL8kSmOO9gRL9Vs4KS8Q-oZqFCmAZAn4kgMnm1z6nu3-tz0hxrBH_dFfs8dx_jkU7TEelmR6pkC2U6j_0_wVi5LgrSRlYmg7CZoqNuhH2I9mcdyzCSXLQ0GPULfDr8B0s9FeHo/s1600/photo.JPG" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5537952967821027954" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi6XjIvMmL8kSmOO9gRL9Vs4KS8Q-oZqFCmAZAn4kgMnm1z6nu3-tz0hxrBH_dFfs8dx_jkU7TEelmR6pkC2U6j_0_wVi5LgrSRlYmg7CZoqNuhH2I9mcdyzCSXLQ0GPULfDr8B0s9FeHo/s400/photo.JPG" style="cursor: hand; cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 400px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 400px;" /></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">12 pm:</span> Enjoying a smoothie on my way to Balboa Island for a walk (alone!). I rarely get a moment to walk by myself, as I usually have my trusty sidekick on his razor or bike. This was an amazing treat with ipod loaded with great tunes, and time to pray and walk in the sunshine<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<br />
<br />
<img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5537952960923482690" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEilCDIAEhhguEheK-yZxp6OtatBf1KsGU-J549SzvyTMXJbpc1Qq7O808ChK1YXNBNnRpe441A3cvXOSVD3n6HzkLDftl7Lg7c4TAttSpzwh99nnDFXbmFVQ_DMsfGAwBEWxny2ikVy-Wo/s400/photo.JPG" style="cursor: hand; cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 400px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 400px;" />These ladies just had to be included. I love watching them paint the beauty of balboa. I was reminded of how we are wired to create.<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgf7d_OCMh20125q7yq036xmiTCsNFKU_vjj2CrotjRa-iUJ-C2L85AN9HXK5XIwUA1MgC6hc9xzEl-Xu4mLOuNGKqdf59kNKAAcuByriH2LHqwBJEXiQlgVMAUC4G-2H-SFQFtuu7xQgQ/s1600/photo.JPG" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"></a><br />
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgf7d_OCMh20125q7yq036xmiTCsNFKU_vjj2CrotjRa-iUJ-C2L85AN9HXK5XIwUA1MgC6hc9xzEl-Xu4mLOuNGKqdf59kNKAAcuByriH2LHqwBJEXiQlgVMAUC4G-2H-SFQFtuu7xQgQ/s1600/photo.JPG" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5537952961432577122" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgf7d_OCMh20125q7yq036xmiTCsNFKU_vjj2CrotjRa-iUJ-C2L85AN9HXK5XIwUA1MgC6hc9xzEl-Xu4mLOuNGKqdf59kNKAAcuByriH2LHqwBJEXiQlgVMAUC4G-2H-SFQFtuu7xQgQ/s400/photo.JPG" style="cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 400px; margin-bottom: 10px; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left; width: 400px;" /></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">1 pm:</span> The end of my walk. Oh, how I love this place and I am so thankful that it is now only about 10 minutes from my home. I came home a much different mama than when I left. Feeling more peaceful and with a fresh perspective on loving my family in the mundane (something I was struggling with in the morning).<br />
<br />
<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhZJMtyfdLOjM28hV_rC3pCaCPzDqDI-3NssGkCNG0-SbFFZBPIy3E4tMHqZ2l54hF5JuYpJ9UH1yoUSS5EBKLiC72a1hCYxhpdAo68v8AmIZgqUDDaAZ6ugQeWjN2ZXfhVcMwilKB5npk/s1600/photo.JPG" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5537952629086418530" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhZJMtyfdLOjM28hV_rC3pCaCPzDqDI-3NssGkCNG0-SbFFZBPIy3E4tMHqZ2l54hF5JuYpJ9UH1yoUSS5EBKLiC72a1hCYxhpdAo68v8AmIZgqUDDaAZ6ugQeWjN2ZXfhVcMwilKB5npk/s400/photo.JPG" style="cursor: hand; cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 400px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 400px;" /></a></div>
<div>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">2 pm:</span> Starting a craft project in my daughter's room. I gathered stuff that has been lurking in the garage to create some much-needed (FREE!!) wall art in her new room.<br />
<br />
<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg58dbz6n9AY7DzOJydMwDhLqbTynYeveERfgY4gEdGMOat_AzP2Ebp-FHJUx95Nb7rdxkMwodUvOEMfPZc1LVNDmyEKdt6rQ00c2RC23GJzDI3ANC8MnEK4xKTJEQJYt5ohkqUqQCon1Y/s1600/photo.JPG" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5537952630265597266" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg58dbz6n9AY7DzOJydMwDhLqbTynYeveERfgY4gEdGMOat_AzP2Ebp-FHJUx95Nb7rdxkMwodUvOEMfPZc1LVNDmyEKdt6rQ00c2RC23GJzDI3ANC8MnEK4xKTJEQJYt5ohkqUqQCon1Y/s400/photo.JPG" style="cursor: hand; cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 400px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 400px;" /></a><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">3 pm:</span> Done! Love it. Love that it was free. (I will share more about this craft project tomorrow.)<br />
<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiIqoikclLx8H9jFB2qhi24HM1ovDlasqBxoAe94KulF6o9YBQAPx963CJE4zZaMRQ6xdGt6FdZ3uYzTobsG7_rltXo6VZOh0wun9piM4K6PsRbcrfk6PKXaM8ViFjCBTVce1XLlIpmcB0/s1600/photo.JPG" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5537952351355105202" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiIqoikclLx8H9jFB2qhi24HM1ovDlasqBxoAe94KulF6o9YBQAPx963CJE4zZaMRQ6xdGt6FdZ3uYzTobsG7_rltXo6VZOh0wun9piM4K6PsRbcrfk6PKXaM8ViFjCBTVce1XLlIpmcB0/s400/photo.JPG" style="cursor: hand; cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 400px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 400px;" /></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">4 pm:</span> Homework time with my sweet girlie.<br />
<br />
<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEieOwAbBE3AuNHCPx7Vutz4j_va8rQduMU4QaWDjYe1sHvhZBLn3GDGDYdlgWjijxUBIIC3RhLxuKZBEhaGghA7OVykHV5SrVDv2fWaVEExU2dELoiv2TcTIRyHTg-z2deU_SPSp4nQhFw/s1600/photo.JPG" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5537952348672219378" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEieOwAbBE3AuNHCPx7Vutz4j_va8rQduMU4QaWDjYe1sHvhZBLn3GDGDYdlgWjijxUBIIC3RhLxuKZBEhaGghA7OVykHV5SrVDv2fWaVEExU2dELoiv2TcTIRyHTg-z2deU_SPSp4nQhFw/s400/photo.JPG" style="cursor: hand; cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 400px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 400px;" /></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">5 pm:</span> Dinner prep. Taco Tuesday. Everything was ready for our return from soccer.<br />
<br />
<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgDR5-HJe9kOLlhmsfbkjslrvb0V1oKBibhIE9G-ElYNU0hDni5V7IzU88KDuEihQlIf7pYwskWf4kLnx3Y4d2FgHrYv14OJQgPv3aq-yRhffF7UzTl4pnDzEzlk04aNAjiQ1QK5SdosNE/s1600/photo.JPG" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5537952343395240178" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgDR5-HJe9kOLlhmsfbkjslrvb0V1oKBibhIE9G-ElYNU0hDni5V7IzU88KDuEihQlIf7pYwskWf4kLnx3Y4d2FgHrYv14OJQgPv3aq-yRhffF7UzTl4pnDzEzlk04aNAjiQ1QK5SdosNE/s400/photo.JPG" style="cursor: hand; cursor: pointer; display: block; height: 400px; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; width: 400px;" /></a></div>
<div>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">6 pm:</span> Soccer practice. Not pictured here - the invisible icicles hanging from my body. It was so cold! Fall has definitely arrived. We played "how hot can it get" in the car on the way home with the heater blasting.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
It was a lovely day of ordinary moments.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Sidenote: All photos from today were taken on my iphone using the instagram app. It is pretty awesome. A fun way to play with different effects and offers immediate sharing to facebook, flickr, etc. And its free!</div>
Ali http://www.blogger.com/profile/09903537076363946309noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-584112316194604185.post-31049562220926073672010-11-09T21:40:00.000-08:002010-11-09T22:20:01.239-08:00sigh.<div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div>I have a lot of love for the book, <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Jesus-Calling-Enjoying-Peace-Presence/dp/1591451884/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1289369969&sr=8-1">Jesus Calling</a>. It has been such a gift to my days in a busy season. It feels as though each day has not only been written for me, but that it truly has been written for THAT day. <div><br /></div><div>This was what I read a few days ago. </div><div><br /></div><div><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg-Gd6CnO14XAZy2l91-DcRTdPn1aAXnFhKoazFn9_GwS8h2yNBvftfHck6gtWNMBdTV6DI30eUNlt-CZlr32i04PbxYOfm1lAuX86J-77MJnbS_FxMv899cY4SNAVSPtq7wo6s6qBYNlA/s400/release.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5537798619936659746" /></div><div><br /></div><div>I love that phrase so much - "instead of grasping and controlling, you are learning to release and receive."</div><div><br /></div><div>It is funny - I have been so sensitive lately to the "grasping and controlling" that I see in my children. It is like needles on a chalkboard when I see them walking through life with a posture of entitlement. It is painful for me. </div><div><br /></div><div>I had a moment this week where I caught a glimpse of myself modeling that same posture that makes me completely crazy when I see it in my children. God gently reminding me how far I have to come. And, reminding me at the same time that I should have a lot more grace for my kids.</div><div><br /></div><div>Ouch.</div><div><br /></div><div>Sigh.</div><div><br /></div><div>So, today, I am thankful for this simple little devotional book that daily gives me some really good food for thought.</div>Ali http://www.blogger.com/profile/09903537076363946309noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-584112316194604185.post-58439097186368252762010-10-07T09:13:00.001-07:002010-10-07T09:13:33.001-07:00Recycled Plastic Bag Pumpkin Craft<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgAimCkkM_S4byzS4uOp5BzFjUpeAtyDxAawPjNk7K1wtqhBwyIDDT9JtZSMNj2FXfUTNY_2QAZRExxaX_Azuv1TMfrFbM_8iyxMNizDv3PWGGeIyCkzLExvdbSirChyphenhyphenU-pfOmQ6qgLzxM/s320/pumpkin+7.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 299px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgAimCkkM_S4byzS4uOp5BzFjUpeAtyDxAawPjNk7K1wtqhBwyIDDT9JtZSMNj2FXfUTNY_2QAZRExxaX_Azuv1TMfrFbM_8iyxMNizDv3PWGGeIyCkzLExvdbSirChyphenhyphenU-pfOmQ6qgLzxM/s320/pumpkin+7.jpg" border="0" alt="" /></a><br />We have a full-blown pumpkin obsession going on in our house. It started with just one pumpkin. We were at Trader Joe's and I had my trusty 4 year old companion with me. (Sidenote: I don't think he has ever been more scrumptious than at this current age. He has this way of talking like John Wayne - out of the side of his mouth with his s's sounding like a cross between a "sh" and "z" sound.)<div><br /></div><div>He spotted the massive display of pumpkins and wanted to bring one home. One turned into two, and they made it into our cart. They had names by the time we got home. "Pumpky" (I know, original, right. Everything that he names ends with the "-ie" sound. His pet stuffed dolphin is "Dolphy" and his stuffed turtle is "Shelly" and his stuffed owl is "Owly".) and "Papa Pumpky".</div><div>These pumpkins got lots and lots of love over the next week. He would sit with them on the front porch, "visiting". He introduces them to his cars and his friends and his stuffed animal friends. He shares his snack with them. -So, all this love and appreciation softened my heart for the next Trader's visit and when he asked so nicely if he could please get another pumpkin for the pumpky family, I was in. </div><div><br /></div><div>The trend has been established - when we go to Trader Joe's, we return with a pumpkin for our little pumpky family. We are up to about 7 pumpkins. I will say that the prices for these pumpkins are the lowest I have ever seen. (Reason #798 I love Trader Joe's).</div><div><br /></div><div>So, when I stumbled on <a href="http://www.artprojectsforkids.org/2010/08/plastic-bag-mache-pumpkin.html">this craft idea</a>, I knew we had to try it. I love that we can recycle plastic grocery bags into a cute pumpkin craft. This is also one pumpkin that will last longer than the Fall season. Allow yourself some time to scroll through <a href="http://www.artprojectsforkids.org/">Kathy's blog</a>. It is full of so many great art projects for kids. (I love the step-by-step instructions she gives.)</div><div><br /></div>Ali http://www.blogger.com/profile/09903537076363946309noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-584112316194604185.post-46838226013798208632010-07-05T11:58:00.000-07:002010-07-05T12:33:53.423-07:00Quick Cinnamon Rolls. Heavenly.<img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 266px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgP0cRxhd165MdiHFMsOKRF5RjQ0DDYelDfBDmRirGJXyuF1EpsUplAVGvFhjFwWXlqj1AIWfMVPdY-Doy1X24hWnJrJ3Kag8je8GVSbMr3l09tCF2m7CTEc2-clbMRceDSVfxuMU28J00/s400/DSC_0008.JPG" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5490499924825748082" /><br /><div><div style="text-align: center;">These were an impromptu creation. We have decided as a family that these shall be hereforth called "Christmas Morning Rolls". Because they taste so good - they taste like Christmas. And, they were easy. Way too easy to taste <i>this</i> good.</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;">Last week, <a href="http://www.mamamanifesto.com/2010/06/dreamy-summer-vacation-recipe-pizza.html">we discovered how to make Pizza Balls out of pizza dough</a>. These cinnamon rolls were made out of the same whole-wheat pizza dough from Trader Joe's.</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;">Here's the lowdown. </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">Ingredients needed:</div><div style="text-align: left;">1 package whole wheat pizza dough, or recipe of pizza dough</div><div style="text-align: left;">a few table spoons of olive oil in a bowl</div><div style="text-align: left;">2 tablespoons of brown sugar</div><div style="text-align: left;">cinnamon</div><div style="text-align: left;">pumpkin pie spice</div><div style="text-align: left;">walnuts (probably about 3 tablespoons)</div><div style="text-align: left;">olive oil cooking spray</div><div style="text-align: left;">optional - glaze made with 1/4 cup powdered sugar, 1 tbsp milk, 1 teaspoon pure vanilla extract all whisked together</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">1. Preheat oven to 375 degrees. Spray the inside of a cake pan or bundt cake pan with olive oil cooking spray.</div><div style="text-align: left;">2. Follow instructions for pizza dough preparation, and after it has risen according to instructions, roll out on a lightly floured surface into a large rectangle about a 1/4 inch thick.</div><div style="text-align: left;">3. Once you have your dough rolled out, brush the surface of dough with olive oil with a pastry brush (this is a perfect task for a pint sized helper).</div><div style="text-align: left;">4. Sprinkle brown sugar evenly over the dough. Follow with cinnamon and pumpkin pie spice (do as much as you like. I was pretty generous because I love cinnamon). Lastly, sprinkle walnuts evenly over the dough. I did not measure how many nuts we did. The kids just did handfuls until it looked good to us. When done, spray a light layer of olive oil spray over the nut mixture.</div><div style="text-align: left;">5. On the shortest side of the rectangle begin rolling the dough up into a long roll. Roll it as tight as you can. Lightly spray the roll on all sides with olive oil cooking spray.</div><div style="text-align: left;">6. Take a pizza cutter, and cut the roll into sections that are about 1 inch wide. Place the rolls into your cake pan like you see in the photo below.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 265px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEicC8NmRt4Ot-eTD_3BGZQKapxeRthTZ6KHtzn20U7IjKZlfCBhISRq10cw_a2Pyb-0xfunG9XCc8sPzlYWc3nOKN3MSOauB9rGrhN_Ctuqyv17hPMC_f1qJJ3opw2KQYdjSnx-6lPo3s4/s400/DSC_0004.JPG" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5490499912688951618" /><br /><div style="text-align: center;"></div></div><div><div style="text-align: left;">7. Bake for 30 - 35 minutes or until the rolls are lightly browned on the top and the dough feels done, but not dry. (We are very technical around here) :) While the rolls bake, prepare the glaze if you are using it. They would be lovely either way.</div><div style="text-align: left;">8. Remove from oven and top with glaze.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size:x-large;">ENJOY!</span></div><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div></div>Ali http://www.blogger.com/profile/09903537076363946309noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-584112316194604185.post-6213406273501827682010-06-29T10:21:00.000-07:002010-06-29T10:46:18.420-07:00it's lovely.<div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div>My last post was about how life would be different if I was intentionally making some specific choices. What a difference a few little things make. I am in a season that is marked by intentionality (it's totally a word). In true Ali fashion, there is a lot of analyzing in my head... I am a bit irritated by social media (facebook especially). I am asking myself a lot of questions about blogging ... why do we do it? ... what's the purpose? ... is it worth the time sacrificed that could be spent elsewhere? ... am I reading more about other people's lives than living my own? ... is this feeding my "people pleasing" issues? ... is this feeding my quest to build my identity? and probably most importantly - how does my interaction with blogging (writing and reading) impact my family?<div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div>Why am I irritated with Facebook? It could just be me, but I feel like facebook is the laziest way to communicate. I am not a fan of learning big news about my closest friends lives in a "news feed". I go to facebook to feel more connected and I would say 95% of the time leave feeling less connected and kind of out of the loop on everything. And, I am all for striving to be positive and meditate on the lovely in our lives, but facebook often feels like a long list of bragging. Sorry, but that is how it feels. And, really, should we all care about which starbucks beverages are being consumed by our friends? I am thinking of unplugging the facebook umbilical cord all together. I'm processing.</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div>This is a quote I've been pondering lately and I just can't quite figure out how it melds with the facebook world ...</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div>"Is what you're about to say going to improve upon the silence?"</div><div>-Ghandi</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div>Being intentional. That's what we were talking about. My hubby shared a great morsel from an author he loves. This fella encourages smiling whenever you speak to people. Obviously, not smiling while you are talking about something sad. Be real, people. But, smiling when speaking for the most part. It's quite pleasant, really. Its quite surprising what a difference a smile makes in one's entire disposition. I've been practicing smiling while driving, and oddly I feel more peaceful.</div><div><br /></div><div>Speaking of smiling ... we have an improved smile over here.</div><div><br /></div><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 266px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjEsdOVTzFIhsHPXqaEuCFZeAbwhDrzcS6xxwC7oTJmvGhJeSw8ajaNgIbHzvDrMc4u4zbDhvBBU_Y6zem4QnD-B7Glbmm1acoEbL6tnuPho-sAmXbonoloCYxh4dfEDI2MB0BmAq4oPNw/s400/DSC_0009.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5488252356692493746" /><div><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;">Logan lost her first tooth. It was a long-awaited event. She penned this letter to her tooth fairy, which made me giggle.</div><div><br /></div><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 266px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi2GazGBTx59SdNZE3skanvHqsLW-Leeec48aFAbAUWMnZRFl40OwrWT27-nj-GO71kN-WEd1EOHeg7g0ERtK8ZBcBos6tAkCx_MaeKsy0BsI7LVcp2LQFy5m3TQYnOSsrnZKXj3r4VmM8/s400/DSC_0014.JPG" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5488251565108164626" /><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 266px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjU_PU41_hQEp_x66gisRvSy-zaVZ0aLxIwU87bZN4S02kPO5eb5SpxO7GtACPnvOjLwhmt82g-mTqKBo-jdymazoQBxzfxaVBwQoES2WKrEiDHWBN7eQ5uADHMHv7cDrJuyy32vNn1Dxw/s400/DSC_0015.JPG" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5488251571958586482" /><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjP5YIoETEX70lR3lhDYiNg1eDOxDpOIDJIoICLQEs_bKhVXFIQQlACgSonK1HC4BeeAeSMFhrWZYAQU0wu_OgeHR3BmRLTC8f_dZdLA6DLlsbssQZfM5eD0uj24WqLgXwngdGzOFbRcqQ/s1600/DSC_0016.JPG"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 266px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjP5YIoETEX70lR3lhDYiNg1eDOxDpOIDJIoICLQEs_bKhVXFIQQlACgSonK1HC4BeeAeSMFhrWZYAQU0wu_OgeHR3BmRLTC8f_dZdLA6DLlsbssQZfM5eD0uj24WqLgXwngdGzOFbRcqQ/s400/DSC_0016.JPG" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5488251583770403282" /></a><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div>Ali http://www.blogger.com/profile/09903537076363946309noreply@blogger.com